The Demise of the Young
by ArabellaBlack25
Summary: 'You have now lost your mother, your father, and the person you love. Of course you care.' Part of my 'Potter and Black' Universe. AU of my AU where instead of Sirius dying, Arabella does. This is Harry's life without her.


**disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nah, just Arabella. I also do not own the song 'Saturn' by Sleeping at Last. That song makes me want to cry sometimes and I thought it fit the situation. **

**Hello everyone! This is tied to my 'Potter and Black' series where instead of Sirius dying, it's Arabella. It mostly tells the story of Harry with everyone else in between. Towards the end of the fifth book, I was considering killing Arabella off and created a timeline of what would happen to Harry. In the end, of course, that didn't happen, but it didn't stop me from thinking about the possibility or writing this. It's an AU of my AU. ****It's long, hope you like it!**

The Demise of the Young

* * *

_You taught me the courage of stars before you left_

_How light carries on endlessly, even after death_

* * *

The problem with Arabella Black is that she feels alive when she's face to face with Bellatrix Lestrange. She can feel her heartbeat increasing, the blood rushing through her veins, the thrill and the excitement radiating through her skin. She's never felt more alive than right now at this moment. Every fiber in her body is alert and ready.

Bellatrix was laughing at her while sending curses and jinxes her way. Not that Arabella wasn't giving right back to her, she was. She couldn't tell which spell was coming from whom. Everything was a blur of light mixed with laughter.

They were so close to the veil, Arabella could hear the whispers urging her to come closer.

'Impedimenta!' cried Arabella.

Bellatrix fell backwards with a shriek, not before sending a jet of red light towards her. Arabella dodged it easily, laughing at her face.

'Come on, _Bella_,' shouted Arabella, smirking. Her arms were spread out for a moment before slumping down to her sides, antagonizing her. 'You gone soft on me? Azkaban make a little _softie_? You can do better than that!'

Her voice echoed around the room with Harry, Neville, Sirius and Remus watching her. Dumbledore was rounding up the Death Eaters with Kingsley helping him.

Arabella laughed as she dodged another one, but the second one. The second one hit her on the chest.

* * *

The second jet of light hit her square on the chest.

The laughter had not quite died from her face, but her eyes were wide with shock before twinkling with amusement once again.

Harry released Neville, though he was unaware of doing so. He was jumping down the steps again, pulling out his wand, as Dumbledore turned to the dais too.

It seemed to take Arabella a thousand years to fall. Her body curved in a graceful arc as she sank backwards through the ragged veil hanging from the arch…

There was a interspersed look of peace and surprise on Arabella's beautiful face as she fell through the ancient doorway and disappeared behind the veil, which fluttered for a moment as though in a high wind and then fell back into place.

Harry heard Bellatrix Lestrange's triumphant scream but know it meant nothing – Arabella had only fallen through the archway, she would reappear from the other side any second…

But Arabella did not reappear.

'ARABELLA!' Harry yelled, 'ARABELLA!'

He had reached the floor, his breath coming in searing gasps. Arabella must be behind the curtain. Harry would pull her back out again…

But as he reached the ground and sprinted towards the dais, Remus grabbed Harry around the chest, holding him back.

'There's nothing you can do, Harry –'

'Get her, save her, she's only just gone through!'

'It's too late, Harry –'

'We can still reach her –'

Harry struggled hard and viciously, but Remus would not let go…

'There's nothing you can do, Harry… nothing… She's gone.'

'She hasn't gone!' Harry yelled.

He did not want to believe it, he would not believe it. Still he fought Remus with every bit of strength he had. Remus did not understand, people hid behind the curtain, he had heard the whispering the first time he had entered the room – Arabella was hiding, simply loitering out of sight –

'ARABELLA!' he bellowed, 'ARABELLA!'

'She can't come back, Harry,' said Remus, his voice breaking as he struggled to contain Harry. 'She can't come back, because she's d –'

'SHE – IS – NOT – DEAD!' roared Harry. 'ARABELLA!'

There was movement going on around them, pointless bustling, the flashes of more spells. To Harry it was meaningless noise, the deflected curses flying past them did not matter, nothing mattered except that Remus stopped pretending that Arabella, who was standing feet from them behind that old curtain, was not going to emerge at any moment, shaking back her tangled hair with a smile and eager to re-enter the battle –

Remus dragged Harry away from the dais, Harry still staring at the archway, angry at Arabella for keeping him waiting –

But some part of him realized, even as he fought free from Remus, that Arabella had never kept him waiting before… She was always eager to see him… eager to be with him… smiling at him… If Arabella was not reappearing out of that archway when Harry was yelling for her as though his life depended on it, the only possible explanation was that she could not come back… That she really was…

Dumbledore had most of the remaining Death Eaters grouped in the middle of the room, seemingly immobilized by invisible ropes. Mad-Eye had crawled across the room to where Tonks lay and was attempting to revive her. Behind the dais there was still flashed of light, grunts, and cries – Kingsley had run forward to continue Arabella's duel with Bellatrix.

'Harry?'

Neville had slid down the stone benches one by one to the place where Harry stood. Remus had let go of Harry and went to where Sirius was standing, looking at the dais in hopelessness. He looked as lost as Remus put his arms around his shoulders.

'Harry… I'm really sorry…' said Neville, his voice cracking as well. 'Arabella… she was…'

There was a loud bang and a yell from behind the dais. Harry saw Kingsley, yelling in pain, hit the ground. Bellatrix Lestrange turned and ran as Dumbledore whipped around. He aimed a spell at her but she deflected it. She was halfway up the steps now –

'Harry – no!' cried Neville.

'SHE KILLED ARABELLA!' bellowed Harry. 'SHE KILLED HER – I'LL KILL HER!'

And he was off, scrambling up the stone benches. People were shouting behind him, but he did not care. Harry could see the hem of Bellatrix's robes whipping out of sight ahead and they were back in the room where brains were swimming…

Bellatrix aimed a curse over her shoulder and Harry sidestepped it. He wrenched the door into the circular black hall and saw Bellatrix disappearing through a door on the other side of the room – beyond her was the corridor leading back to the lifts.

He ran, but she had slammed the door behind her and the walls had begun to rotate again.

'Where's the exit?' he shouted desperately, as the wall rumbled to a halt again. 'Where's the way out?'

The room seemed to have been waiting for him to ask. The door right behind him flew open, and the corridor toward the lifts stretched ahead of him, torch-lit and empty. He ran...

He could hear a lift clattering ahead of him. He sprinted up the passageway, swung around the corner, and slammed his fist onto the button to call a second lift. It jangled and banged lower and lower. The grilles slid open and Harry dashed inside, now hammering the button marked Atrium. The doors slid shut and he was rising.

He forced his way out of the lift before the grilles were fully open and looked around. Bellatrix was almost at the telephone lift at the other end of the hall, but she looked back as he sprinted toward her, and aimed another spell at him. He dodged behind the Fountain of Magical Brethren. The spell zoomed past him and hit the wrought gold gates at the other end of the Atrium so that they rang like bells. There were no more footsteps. She had stopped running. He crouched behind the statues, listening.

'_Come out, come out, little Harry_!' she called in her mock-baby voice, which echoed off the polished wooden floors. 'What did you come after me for, then? I thought you were here to avenge my dear niece!'

'I am!' shouted Harry, and a score of ghostly Harry's seemed to chorus _I am_! _I am_! _I _am! All around the room.

'Aaaaah… did you _love _her, little baby Potter? Did little Potter _love_ little Black? _Potter and Black_!'

Burning hot hatred rose in Harry such as he had never known before. He flung himself from behind the fountain and bellowed _'_Crucio!'

Bellatrix screamed. The spell had knocked her off her feet, but she did not writhe and shriek in pain – she was already on her feet again, breathless, no longer laughing. Harry dodged behind the golden fountain again – her counterspell hit the head of the handsome wizard, which was blown off and landed twenty feet away, gouging long scratches into the wooden floor.

'Never used an Unforgivable Curse before, have you, boy?' she yelled. She had abandoned her baby voice now. 'You need to _mean _them, Potter! You need to really want to cause pain – to enjoy it – righteous anger won't hurt me for long – I'll show you how it is done, shall I? I give you a lesson, just like how I did with _Arabella_ –'

Harry had been edging around the fountain on the other side. She screamed 'Crucio!' and he was forced to duck down again as the centaur's arm, holding its bow, spun off and landed with a crash in the floor a short distance from the golden wizard's head.

'Potter, you cannot win against me!' she cried. He could hear her moving to the right, trying to get a clear shot of him. He backed around the statue away from her, crouching behind the centaur's legs, his head level with the house-elf's. 'I was and am the Dark Lord's most loyal servant, I learned the Dark Arts from him, and I know spells of such power that you, pathetic little boy, can never hope to compete –'

'Stupefy!' yelled Harry. He had edged right around to where the goblin stood beaming up the now headless wizard and taken aim at her back as she peered around the fountain for him. She reacted so fast he barely had time to duck.

'Protego!'

The jet of red light, his own Stunning Spell, bounced back at him. Harry scrambled back behind the fountain, and one of the goblin's ears went flying across the room.

'Potter, I am going to give you one chance!' shouted Bellatrix. 'Give me the prophecy – roll it out toward me now – and I may spare your life!'

'Well, you're going to have to kill me, because it's gone!' Harry roared – and as he shouted it, pain seared across his forehead. His scar was on fire again, and he felt a surge of fury that was quite unconnected with his own rage. 'And he knows!' said Harry with a mad laugh to match Bellatrix's own. 'Your dear old mate Voldemort knows it's gone! He's not going to be happy with you, is he?'

'What? What do you mean?' she cried, and for the first time there was fear in her voice.

'The prophecy smashed when I was trying to get Neville up the steps! What do you think Voldemort'll say about that, then?'

His scar seared and burned… The pain of it was making his eyes steam…

'LIAR!' she shrieked, but he could hear the terror behind the anger now. 'YOU'VE GOT IT, POTTER, AND YOU WILL GIVE IT TO ME – Accio Prophecy! ACCIO PROPHECY!'

Harry laughed again because he knew it would incense her, the pain building in his head so badly he thought his skull might burst. He waved his empty hand from behind the one-eared goblin and withdrew it quickly as she sent another jet of green light flying at him.

'Nothing there!' he shouted. 'Nothing to summon! It smashed and nobody heard what it said, tell your boss that –'

'No!' she screamed. 'It isn't true, you're lying – MASTER, I TRIED, I TRIED – DO NOT PUNISH ME –'

'Don't waste your breath!' yelled Harry, his eyes screwed up against the pain in his scar, now more terrible them ever. 'He can't hear you from here!'

'Can't I, Potter?' said a high, cold voice.

Harry opened his eyes.

Tall, think, and black-hooded, his terrible snakelike face white and gaunt, his scarlet, slit-pupiled eyes staring… Lord Voldemort had appeared in the middle of the hall, his wand pointing at Harry, who stood frozen, quite unable to move.

'So you smashed my prophecy?' said Voldemort softly, staring at Harry with those pitiless red eyes. 'No, Bella, he is not lying… I see the truth looking at me from within his worthless mind… Months of preparation, months of effort… and my Death Eaters have let Harry Potter thwart me again…'

'Master, I am sorry, I knew not, I was fighting the Black child!' sobbed Bellatrix, flinging herself down at Voldemort's feet as he placed slowly nearer. 'Master, you should know –'

'Be quiet, Bella,' said Voldemort dangerously. 'I shall deal with you in a moment. Do you think I have entered the Ministry of Magic to hear you sniveling apologies?'

'But Master – he is here – he is below –'

'I have nothing more to say to you, Potter,' he said quietly, 'you have irked me too often, for too long. AVADA KEDAVRA!'

Harry had not even opened his mouth to resist. His mind was blank, his wand pointing uselessly at the floor.

But the headless golden statue of the wizard in the fountain had sprung alive, leaping from its pedestal and landed on the floor with a crash between Harry and Voldemort. The spell merely glanced off its chest as the stature flung out its arms, protecting Harry.

'What –?' said Voldemort, staring around. And then he breathed, 'Dumbledore!'

Harry looked behind him, his heart pounding. Dumbledore was standing in front of the golden gates.

Voldemort raised his wand and sent another jet of green light at Dumbledore, who turned and was gone in a whirling of his cloak. Next second he had reappeared behind Voldemort and waved his wand toward the remnants of the fountain. The other statues sprang to life as well. The statue of the witch ran at Bellatrix, who screamed and sent spells uselessly off its chest, before it dived at her, pinning her to the floor. Meanwhile, the goblin and the house-elf scuttled toward the fireplaces set along the all, and the one-armed centaur galloped at Voldemort, who vanished and reappeared beside the pool. The headless statue thrust Harry backward, away from the fight, as Dumbledore advanced on Voldemort and the golden centaur cantered around them both.

'It was foolish to come here tonight, Tom,' said Dumbledore calmly. 'The Aurors are on their way –'

'By which time I shall be gone and you dead!' spat Voldemort. He sent another Killing Curse at Dumbledore but missed, instead hitting the security guards desk, which burst into flame.

Dumbledore flicked his own wand. The force of the spell that emanated from it was such that Harry, shielded by the stone guard, felt the hair on his arms stand on end as it passed, and this time Voldemort was forced to conjure a shining silver shield out of thin air to deflect it. The spell, whatever it was, caused no visible damage to the shield, though a deep, gonglike note reverberated from it, an oddly chilling sound…

'You do not seek to kill me, Dumbledore?' called Voldemort, his scarlet eyes narrowed over the top of the shield. 'Above such brutality, are you?'

'We both know that there are other ways of destroying a man, Tom,' Dumbledore said calmly, continuing to walk toward Voldemort as though he had not a fear in the world, as though nothing had happened to interrupt his stroll up the hall. 'Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I admit –'

'There is nothing worse than death, Dumbledore!' snarled Voldemort.

'You are quite wrong,' said Dumbledore, still closing in upon Voldemort and speaking as lightly as though they were discussing the matter over drinks. 'Indeed, your failure to understand that there are things much worse than death has always been your greatest weakness –'

Another jet of green light flew from behind the silver shield. This time it was the one-armed centaur, galloping in front of Dumbledore, that took the blast and shattered into a hundred pieces, but before the fragments had even hit the floor, Dumbledore had drawn back his wand and waved it as though brandishing a whip. A long thin flame flew from the tip; it wrapped itself around Voldemort, shield and all. For a moment, it seemed Dumbledore had won, but then the fiery rope became a serpent, which relinquished its hold upon Voldemort at once and turned hissing furiously, to face Dumbledore.

Voldemort vanished. The snake reared from the floor, ready to strike –

There was a burst of flame in midair above Dumbledore just as Voldemort reappeared, standing on the plinth in the middle of the pool where so recently the five statues had stood.

'Look out!' Harry yelled.

But even as he shouted, one more jet of green light had flown at Dumbledore from Voldemort's wand and the snake has struck –

Fawkes swooped down in front of Dumbledore, opened his beak wide, and swallowed the jet of green light whole. He burst into flame and fell to the floor, small wrinkled, and flightless. At the same moment, Dumbledore brandished his wand in one, long, fluid movement – the snake flew high into the air and vanished in a wisp of dark smoke. The water in the pool rose up and covered Voldemort like a cocoon of molten glass –

For a few seconds Voldemort was visible only as a dark, rippling, faceless figure, shimmering and indistinct upon the plinth, clearly struggling to throw off the suffocating mass –

Then he was gone, and the water fell with a crash back into its pool, slopping wildly over the sides, drenching the polished floor.

'MASTER!' screamed Bellatrix.

Sure it was over, Voldemort had decided to flee, Harry made to run out from behind the statue guard, but Dumbledore bellowed, 'Stay where you are, Harry!'

For the first time, Dumbledore sounded frightened. Harry could not see why. The hall was quite empty but for themselves, the sobbing Bellatrix still trapped under her statue, and the tiny baby Fawkes croaking feebly on the floor –

And then Harry's scar burst open. He knew he was dead: it was pain beyond imagining, pain past endurance –

He was gone from the hall, he was locked in the coils of a creature with red eyes, so tightly bound that Harry did not know where his body ended and the creature's began. They were fused together bound by pain, and there was no escape –

And then the creature spoke, it used Harry's mouth, so that in is agony he felt his jaw move…

'_Kill me now, Dumbledore…'_

Blinded and dying, every part of him screaming for release, Harry felt the creature use him again…

'_If death is nothing, Dumbledore, kill the boy…_'

_Let the pain stop _thought Harry. _Let him kill us… End it, Dumbledore… Death is nothing compared to this…_

_And I'll see Arabella again_…

And as Harry's heart filled with emotion, the creature's coils loosened, the pain was gone, Harry was lying face down on the floor, his glasses gone, shivering as though he lay upon ice, not wood…

* * *

Dawn was approaching.

The silence and the stillness, broken only by the occasional grunt of snuffle of a sleeping portrait, was unbearable to him. If his surroundings could have reflected the feelings inside him, the pictures would have been screaming and hollering in pain. He walked around the quiet, beautiful office, breathing quickly, trying not to think. But he had to think… There was no escape…

It was his fault Arabella had died. It was all his fault. If he, Harry, had not been stupid enough to fall for Voldemort's trick, if he had not been so convinced that what he had seen in his dream was real, if he had only opened his mind to the possibility that Voldemort was, as Hermione had said, banking on Harry's _saving people thing_…

It was unbearable, he would not think about it, he could not stand it… There was a terrible hollow inside him he did not want to feel or examine, a dark hole where Arabella had been, where Arabella had vanished, taking her sweet smile and wicked eyes. He did not want to have to be alone with the great, silent space, he could not stand it –

A picture behind him gave a particularly loud grunting snore, and a cool voice said, 'Ah… Harry Potter…'

Phineas Nigellus gave a long yawn, stretching his arms as he watched Harry with shrewd, narrow eyes.

'And what brings you here in the early hours of the morning?' said Phineas. 'This office is supposed to be barred to all but the rightful headmaster. Or has Dumbledore sent you here? Oh, don't tell me… Another message from my worthless great-great-grandson?'

Harry could not speak. Phineas Nigellus did not know that Arabella was dead. How could he possibly know? But Harry could not tell him. To say it out loud would be to make it final, absolute. It would make the pain seem worse.

A few more of the portraits had stirred now. Terror of being interrogated made Harry stride across the room and seize the doorknob. It would not turn. He was shut in.

'I hope this means,' said the obese, red-nosed wizard who hung on the wall behind Dumbledore's desk, 'that Dumbledore will soon be back with us?'

Harry turned. The wizard was eyeing him with great interest. Harry nodded. He tugged again on the doorknob behind his back, but it remained fixed.

'Oh good,' said the wizard. 'It has been very dull without him, very dull indeed.'

He smiled kindly upon Harry.

'Dumbledore thinks very highly of you, as I am sure you know,' he said comfortably. 'Oh yes. Holds you in great esteem.'

The guilt filling the whole of Harry's chest like some monstrous, weighty parasite now writhed and squirmed. Harry could not stand this, he could not stand being Harry anymore… He had never felt more trapped inside his own head and body, never wished so intensely that he could be somebody – anybody – else…

The empty fireplace burst into emerald-green flame, making Harry leap away from the door, staring at the man spinning inside the grate. As Dumbledore's tall form unfolded itself from the fire, the wizards and witches on the surrounding walls jerked awake. Many of them gave cries of welcome.

'Thank you,' said Dumbledore softly.

He did not look at Harry at first, but walked over to the perch beside the door and withdrew, from an inside pocket of his robes, the tiny Fawkes, whom he laced gently on the tray of soft ashes beneath the golden post.

'Well, Harry,' said Dumbledore, finally turning away from the baby bird, 'you will be pleased to hear that none of your other fellow students are going to suffer lasting damage from the night's events.'

Harry tried to say 'Good,' but no sound came out. It seemed to him that Dumbledore was reminding him of the amount of damage he had caused by his actions tonight, and although Dumbledore was for once looking at him directly, and though his expression was kindly rather than accusatory, Harry could not bear to meet his eyes.

'Madam Pomfrey is patching everybody up now,' said Dumbledore. 'Nymphadora Tonks may need to spend a little time in St. Mungo's, but it seems that she will make a full recovery.'

Harry contented himself with nodding at the carpet, which was growing lighter as the sky outside, grew paler. He was sure that all the portraits around the room were listening eagerly to every word Dumbledore spoke, wondering where Dumbledore and Harry had been and why there had been injuries.

'I know how you are feeling, Harry,' said Dumbledore very quietly.

'No, you don't,' said Harry, and his voice was suddenly loud and strong. White-hot anger leapt inside him. Dumbledore knew _nothing_ about his feelings. _Nothing. _

'You see, Dumbledore?' said Phineas Nigellus slyly. 'Never try to understand the students. They hate it. They would much rather be tragically misunderstood, wallow in self-pity, stew in their own –'

'That's enough, Phineas,' said Dumbledore.

Harry turned his back on Dumbledore and stared determinedly out of the opposite window. He could see the Quidditch stadium in the distance. He remembered Arabella's Chaser tryouts… They were a good team… She was amazing… She was a natural… And now, she was…

'There is no shame in what you are feeling, Harry,' said Dumbledore. 'On the contrary… the fact that you can feel pain like this is your greatest strength.'

Harry felt the white-hot anger lick his insides, blazing the terrible emptiness, filling him with the desire to hurt Dumbledore for his calmness and his empty words.

'My greatest strength, is it?' said Harry, his voice shaking as he stared out at the Quidditch stadium, no longer seeing it. 'You haven't got a clue…You don't know…'

'What don't I know?' asked Dumbledore calmly.

It was too much. Harry turned around, shaking with rage.

'I don't want to talk about how I feel, all right?'

'Harry, suffering like this proves you are still a man! This pain is part of being human –'

'THEN – I – DON'T – WANT – TO – BE – HUMAN!' Harry roared, and he seized one of the delicate silver instruments from the table beside him and flung it across the room. It shattered into a hundred tiny pieces against the wall. Several of the pictures let out yells of anger and fright, and the portrait of Armando Dippet said, '_Really_!'

'I DON'T CARE!' Harry yelled at them, snatching up a lunascope and throwing it into the fireplace. 'I'VE HAD ENOUGH, I'VE SEEN ENOUGH, I WANT OUT, I WANT IT TO END, I DON'T CARE ANYMORE –'

He seized the table on which the silver instrument had stood and threw that too. It broke apart on the floor and the legs rolled in different directions.

'You do care,' said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to stop Harry demolishing his office. His expression was calm, almost detached. 'You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.'

'I – DON'T!' Harry screamed, so loudly that he felt his throat might tear, and for a second he wanted to rush at Dumbledore and break him too. Shatter that calm old face, shake him, hurt him, make him feel some tiny part of the horror inside Harry.

'Oh yes, you do,' said Dumbledore, still more calmly. 'You have now lost your mother, your father, and the person you love. Of course you care.'

'YOU DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL!' Harry roared. 'YOU STANDING THERE – YOU –'

But words were no longer enough, smashing things was no more help. He wanted to run, he wanted to keep running and never look back, he wanted to be somewhere he could not see the clear blue eyes staring back at him. He wanted to see grey. He ran to the door, seized the doorknob again, and wrenched at it.

But the door would not open.

Harry turned back to Dumbledore.

'Let me out,' he said. He was shaking from head to foot.

'No,' said Dumbledore simply.

For a few seconds they stared at each other.

'Let me out,' Harry said again.

'No,' Dumbledore repeated.

'If you don't – if you keep me in here – if you don't let me –'

'By all means continue destroying my possessions,' said Dumbledore serenely. 'I daresay I have too many.'

'Let me out,' Harry said yet again, in a voice that was cold and almost as calm as Dumbledore's.

'Not until I have had my say,' said Dumbledore.

'Do you – do you think I want to – do you think I give a – I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU'VE GOT TO SAY!' Harry roared. 'I don't want to hear anything you've got to say!'

'You will,' said Dumbledore sadly. 'Because you are not nearly as angry with me as you ought to be. If you are to attack me, as I know you are close to doing, I would like to have thoroughly earned it.'

'What are you talking –?'

'It is _my _fault that Arabella died,' said Dumbledore clearly. 'Or I should say almost entirely my fault – I will not be so arrogant as to claim responsibility for the whole. Arabella was brave, clever, and an enigma. Woman like her are not content to just stand aside while they believe others to be in danger. Nevertheless, you should never have believed for an instant that there was any necessity for you to go to the Department of Mysteries tonight. If I had been open with you, Harry, as I should have been, you would have known a long time ago that Voldemort might try and lure you to the Department of Mysteries, and you would never have been tricked into going to going there tonight. And Arabella would not have followed after you. That blame lies with me, and with me alone.'

Harry was still standing with his hand on the doorknob but he was unaware of it. He was gazing at Dumbledore, hardly breathing, listening yet barely understanding what he was hearing.

'Please sit down,' said Dumbledore. It was not an order, it was a request.

Harry hesitated, then walked slowly across the room now littered with silver cogs and fragments of woods and took the seat facing Dumbledore's desk, quickly rubbing his eyes.

'Am I to understand,' said Phineas Nigellus slowly from Harry's left, 'that my great-great-great-granddaughter – one of the last of the Blacks – is dead?'

'Yes, Phineas,' said Dumbledore.

'I don't believe it,' said Phineas curtly.

Harry turned his head in time to see Phineas marching out of his portrait and knew that he had gone to visit his other painting in Grimmauld Place. He would walk, perhaps, from portrait to portrait, calling for Sirius through the house, demanding an explanation…

* * *

A few days ago, before his exams had finished and he had seen the vision Voldemort had planted in his mind, he would have given almost anything for the Wizarding world to know that he had been telling the truth, for them to believe that Voldemort was back and know what he was neither a liar nor mad. Now, however…

He walked a short way around the lake, sat down on its bank, sheltered from passersby by a tangle of shrubs, and stared out over the gleaming water, thinking…

Perhaps the reason he wanted to be alone was because he had felt isolated from everybody since his talk with Dumbledore. An invisible barrier separated him from the rest of the world. He was – he had always been – a marked man. It was just that had had never really understood what that meant…

And yet sitting here on the edge of the lake, with the terrible weight of grief dragging at him, with the loss of Arabella so raw and fresh inside, eating up at him, tearing him apart, he could not muster any great sense of fear. It was sunny and the grounds around him were full of laughing people, and even though he felt as distant from them as though he belonged to a different race, it was still very hard to believe as he sat here that his life must include, or end in, murder…

He sat there for a long time, gazing out at the water, trying not to think about Arabella or remember that it was directly across from there, on the opposite bank, that Arabella cast her first successful Patronus…

The sun had fallen before he realized that he was cold. He got up and returned to the castle, wiping his face on his sleeve as he went.

* * *

Ron and Hermione leave the hospital wing completely cured three days before the end of the term, neither one of them showing any signs of wanting to talk about Arabella.

Hermione is, for a lack of better words, messed up. She doesn't do it in front of people, but she cries, she cries all the time. Her eyes are always puffed up and red. Her face shiny with tears and her smile fake as she tries to stay strong. She spends most of her time thinking about Arabella, though it pains her. She's also sleeping in Arabella's bed in her dormitory, clinging on the pillow, as though Arabella was with her. She always looks at the seat next to her, expecting her friend to appear in thin air.

Ron is quiet, but mad. He doesn't talk much, but always stare off into space, as though remembering something. Whether or not it brought any happiness to him, he never shows it. He tries to put on a masquerade, trying to stay strong for Harry and Hermione, mostly Hermione, but it doesn't work, and he knows it. He sometimes stays up late in the night in the common room, staring at the portrait hole, expecting her to come back. He's torturing himself whenever nobody comes. He sometimes cries, Harry can hear him in the middle of the night, but still keeps the hopeless dream alive. He's fooling himself if he thinks it will happen, but nobody tells him otherwise.

Neville cries sometimes, he doesn't care of anyone makes fun of him, and they don't. They know he's lost another person close to him because of Bellatrix, and nobody brings that up. Ginny is almost as bad as Hermione. She cries shamelessly, and hexes anyone who dares talk bad about Arabella.

* * *

Harry was sprinting out of the dormitory and down the spiral staircase, hitting the walls as he ran and barely noticing. He hurtled across the empty common room through the portrait hole and off along the corridor.

How could it be that the place was full of ghosts whenever you did need one, yet now…

He ran down staircases and along corridors and met nobody either alive or dead. They were all, clearly, in the Great Hall. Outside his Charms classroom he came to a halt, panting and thinking disconsolately that he would have to wait until later, until after the end of the feast…

But just as he had given up hope he saw it – a translucent somebody drifting across the end of the corridor.

'Hey – hey Nick! NICK!'

The ghost stuck its head back out of the wall, revealing the wobbling head of Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington.

'Good evening,' he said, withdrawing the rest of his body from the stone and smiling at Harry. 'I am not the only one who is late, then? Though in rather different senses, of course…'

'Nick, can I ask you something?'

'Er – now, Harry?' said Nick, looking discomforted. 'Can't it wait until after the feast?'

'No – Nick – please,' said Harry, 'I really need to talk to you. Can we go in here?'

Harry opened the door of the nearest classroom and Nick sighed.

'Oh very well,' he said, looking resigned. 'I can't pretend I haven't been expecting it.'

Harry was holding the door open for him, but he drifted through the wall instead.

'Expecting what?' Harry asked, as he closed the door.

'You to come and fine me,' said Nick, now gliding over to the window and looking out at the darkening grounds. 'It happens, sometimes… when someone has suffered a… loss.'

'Well,' said Harry, refusing to be deflected. 'You were right, I've – I've come to find you.'

Nick said nothing.

'It's –' said Harry, who was finding this more awkward than he had anticipated, 'it's just – you're dead. But you're still here, aren't you?'

Nick sighed and continued to gaze out at the grounds.

'That's right, isn't it?' Harry urged him. 'You died, but I'm talking to you… You can walk around Hogwarts and everything, can't you?'

'Yes,' said Nick quietly, 'I walk and talk, yes.'

'So, you came back, didn't you?' said Harry urgently. 'People can come back, right? As ghosts. They don't have to disappear completely. Well?' he added impatiently, when Nick continued to say nothing.

Nick hesitated, then said, 'Not everyone can come back as a ghost.'

'What d'you mean?' said Harry quickly.

'Only… only wizards.'

'Oh,' said Harry, and he almost laughed with relief. 'Well, that's okay then, the person I'm asking about it a wizard. So she can come back, right?'

Nick turned away from the window and looked mournfully at Harry. 'She won't come back.'

'Who?'

'Arabella Black,' said Nick.

'But you did!' said Harry angrily. 'You came back – you're dead and you didn't disappear –'

'Wizards can leave an imprint of themselves upon the earth, to walk palely where their living selves once trod,' said Nick miserably. 'But very few wizards choose that path.'

'Why not?' said Harry. 'Anyway – it doesn't matter – Arabella won't care if it's unusual, she'll come back, I know she will!'

And so strong was his belief that Harry actually turned his head to check the door, sure, for a split second, that he was going to see Arabella, pearly white and transparent but beaming, walking through it toward him with her arms stretched out in front of her, as though waiting to grab him into an embrace.

'She will not come back,' repeated Nick quietly. 'She will have… gone on.'

'What d'you mean, 'gone one'?' said Harry quickly. 'Gone on where? Listen – what happens when you die, anyway? Where do you go? Why doesn't everyone come back? Why isn't this place full of ghosts? Why –?'

'I cannot answer,' said Nick.

'You're dead, aren't you?' said Harry exasperatedly. 'Who can answer better than you?'

'I was afraid of death –'

'She's afraid of death too!'

'Is she really?' Nick asked him pitifully. 'Have you ever asked her? Have you ever talked to her about it? About death?'

For that, Harry had no answer.

Nick sighed. 'We ghosts know the gossips and the history of some of the students that come in this school. We know the history of Arabella Black, and from what I know, from what we both know, death would seem like a better option for her.'

And he left the room, leaving Harry there alone, gazing blankly at the wall through which Nick had disappeared.

Harry felt as though he had lost Arabella all over again in losing the hope that he might be able to see or speak to her once more. He gripped one of the wooden chairs tightly and painfully before picking it up and smashing it against the wall, shattering it into pieces. That did not help him as he walked slowly and miserably down the stone steps until he entered the Hall.

The usual decorations were missing. There were black drapes on the wall beside the teacher's table and all around the Great Hall. They were there as a mark of respect to Arabella.

Everyone was eating their pudding and was nearly done when Harry showed up. They all turned to look at him, but he ignored them and made his way to the isolated part of the table where Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Neville were sitting. He took some pudding for himself, but didn't eat it, just pushed it around in his plate for a while.

Once everyone else had finished, the plates vanished and Dumbledore stood up at the staff table. The Great Hall became very quiet.

'The end,' said Dumbledore, looking around at them all, 'of another year.'

He paused and his eyes fell upon the Gryffindor table. Their table was the quietest table before he had gotten to his feet, and theirs was the saddest and palest faces in the Hall. Harry could feel the pain of the empty space next to him, as though it was taunting her, antagonizing him for all his mistakes.

'There should be another person sitting here,' he gestured toward the Gryffindors, 'enjoying our feast with us. Drinking pumpkin juice with her friends and licking the last of the pudding, courtesy of the house-elves. I would like you all to please stand and raise your glasses to Arabella Black.'

They did it, all of them. The benches scraped as everyone in the Hall stood, and raised their goblets, and echoed, in one loud, low, rumbling voice, 'Arabella Black.'

'Arabella Black was a person who was the representation of a Gryffindor,' Dumbledore continued. 'She was good, loyal, brave, daring, and she had nerve. Her unfortunate death affects you all, whether you knew her or not.'

Hermione and Ginny sniffed their noses with tears streaming down their faces. There were many girls sitting at the Gryffindor table that were crying, including some at Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. Seamus and Dean had their heads down in respect while Ron had his arms crossed with a hard look on his face.

'There are not that many people I know in this world that would stand up and defy Lord Voldemort when it comes to saving a friend's life,' said Dumbledore. Professor McGonagall hiccupped from where she was standing. Her face was shiny with tears. 'And she has done that, but not just on one occasion. She had faced much turmoil in her time at Hogwarts and outside. She had gone through pain beyond human comprehension – torture, scars, loss – and she kept her head up, no matter what. She had a smile on her face every day.'

There was another pause in which Hagrid blew his nose into a tablecloth-sized napkin and Ron rubbed his face with the palm of his hands. Professor Flitwick keeps his head down, not meeting anyone's eyes and Professor Sprout dabs her eyes. There was no expression on Snape.

'And I believe you all have the right to know exactly how her death came about.'

People were staring at Dumbledore and turning their heads to look at Harry. The full news of Arabella's death had not come out. They had announced her death, but the Ministry had kept many details away from the public, especially the murderer.

'Arabella Black was murdered by Bellatrix Lestrange.'

There was a whispering panic sweeping the Great Hall. People were staring at Dumbledore in disbelief. There was a look of sadness on his face as he watched everyone mutter to their neighbour.

'The Ministry of Magic,' Dumbledore continued, 'does not wish to let the public know, just like the year before. The truth is,' he sighed, 'a beautiful and terrible thing, and it is generally preferable to a lie, and I do not wish to lie to any one of you. Arabella Black died thinking that her father was in danger, that her friends were in danger. She risked her life for them, showing a sort of bravery that very few people in this world have, and for that, I honor her in the highest regard.'

Dumbledore raised his goblet once more and nearly everyone in the Great Hall followed suit.

'When you all board the Hogwarts Express and return to your house lives, I encourage you to remember Arabella. Remember Arabella Black. Remember a girl who stood up to Lord Voldemort, a girl who defied Bellatrix Lestrange. Remember a girl who was above all, a good person who had heart. Remember a girl who died believing that she was not alone in her final moments, that she was the power of love instead of hatred she believed in all the years leading up to her death. Remember Arabella.'

* * *

The journey home on the Hogwarts Express the next day was a quiet affair. Ron had proposed a game of Exploding Snaps, but even he wasn't up to it.

When the train had finally puffed to a standstill, Harry lifted down Hedwig's cage and thought about Shay. Where was he? Was he going around Hogwarts searching for his owner? Harry could imagine Shay's green eyes flying around the Hogwarts towers and grounds searching for Arabella, hooting for her to come out of hiding…

When the ticket inspector signaled to him, Ron and Hermione that it was safe to walk through the magical barrier between platforms nine and ten, however, he found a surprise awaiting him on the other side: a group of people standing there to greet him.

There was Mad-Eye Moody, looking quite as sinister with his bowler hat pulled over his magical eye, scowling at them. Tonks stood just behind him, her usual smile not on her face with her hair a dark grey that could be mistaken for black and wearing dark clothes. Next to Tonks was Remus, his face pale, his hair even greyer than before and much shaggier. He looked as though he rolled right out of bed before coming here. To his left was Sirius, with a small smile that did not quite reach his eyes as he looked at Harry. His eyes were bloodshot red and his hair was extremely unkempt. At the front of the group stood Mr and Mrs Weasley, dressed in their Muggle best, but there was a definite sadness as Mrs Weasley's eyes were shiny. Fred and George were wearing brand-new jackets and were much more quiet than their usual selves.

Harry was very grateful that they all talked to his Uncle Vernon, but he needed time away from the wizarding world. Sirius had promised him that he could either stay with him over the summer or at the Weasleys.

* * *

Harry thought he was in love with her before, now he knows he truly is. It's so stupid how he realizes this after she's gone.

You never get used to someone being gone from your life. For a moment, _the tiniest moment_, you think you're okay. You think that everything's going to be fine, that you're going to be okay. You think that, _yes, I'm going to be okay_, _I can do it, I can go on. _But then it hits you all over again. That shock of lose rushes back at you and you realize you'll never be okay again.

Harry could feel that place in his heart that's not filled. It's empty. It's a space that can never be filled. It sounds co cliché: his heart will never be filled again, his heart's so empty. It sounds like something out of those horrible movies Mrs Figg used to watch.

But he knows that it's true. He knows that even if he ever smiled or laughed again, that part in his heart can never be filled again. He knows that more than ever. He'll never stop grieving for Arabella because he'll never stop loving her.

* * *

_In different parts of the country, Arabella can see the damage she has done. _

_She sees Ron holding himself in his room, refusing to walk out for days. Not even Fred and George know what to do to cheer him up. Nobody tries after a while because there was no point trying to bury the pain. _

_Hermione's parents are at a loss when she bursts into tears suddenly during dinner, murmuring 'Arabella' under her breath for hours at a time. _

_Nymphadora curls up in a ball, hugging her pillow. Andromeda wails and breaks plates in the kitchen while Ted tries to stop her from hurting herself. _

_Sirius is holding himself in the new house, bottle of firewhisky in front of him, his eyes red and angry as he stares at a picture of the family he has lost. _

_Remus is waiting in his basement, welcoming the upcoming full moon, welcoming the pain. _

_Harry looks lost and she nearly collapses in front of him as he cries himself to sleep. _

* * *

'I hope you will forgive me for mentioning it, Harry, but I am pleased and a little proud at how well you seen to be coping after everything that happened at the Ministry. Permit me to say that I think Arabella would have been proud of you.'

Harry swallowed. Hs voice seemed to have deserted him. He did not think he could stand to discuss Arabella.

'It was cruel,' said Dumbledore softly,' that you and Arabella had such a short time together. A brutal ending to what should have been a long, happy and loving relationship.'

Harry nodded. He could tell that Dumbledore understood, that he might even suspect that until his letter arrived, Harry had spent nearly all his time at the Dursley's lying on his bed, refusing meals, and staring at the misted window, full of the chill emptiness that he had come to associate with Dementors.

'It's just hard,' Harry said finally, in a low voice, 'to realize I won't ever see her again.'

His eyes burned suddenly and he blinked. He felt so stupid for admitting it, but the fact that he had her in his life had been one of the best things about him… that she was always there for him… and now nothing.

'Arabella represented much more to you than a girlfriend,' said Dumbledore gently. 'She represented more than you will ever know. Naturally, the loss is devastating…'

'But while I was at the Dursley'…' interrupted Harry, his voice growing stronger, 'I realized I can't shut myself away or – or crack up. She wouldn't have wanted that. Life's too short… Look at Madam Bones, look at Emmeline Vance… It could be me next, couldn't it? But if it is,' he said fiercely, now looking straight into Dumbledore's blue eyes, 'I'll make sure I take as many Death Eater with me as I can, and Voldemort too if I can manage it.'

'Spoken like your mother and father's son!' said Dumbledore, with an approving pat on Harry's back. 'I take my hats off to you – or I would, if I were not afraid of showering you in spiders. Now, Harry, I'm sure Sirius had written to you, discussing the funeral.'

'Yeah, it's tomorrow, right?' Harry asked, though he knew it was.

'It is,' said Dumbledore, nodding. 'Unfortunately, the Ministry officials were unable to recover her body. It's going to be an empty casket funeral. You, Miss Granger, and the Weasleys are going to Sirius's new house in Godric's Hollow, Nymphadora Tonks and Alastor Moody will be escorting you all there.

'Okay,' said Harry, nodding his head a little too fast.

* * *

Early the next morning, Harry found himself standing in Sirius's new living room with Mrs Weasley in the kitchen, putting away some comfort food she brought and with everyone sitting on the couch, solemn.

The sky outside represented the mood inside the house. The sky was getting darker and darker by the minute and he was sure it was going to rain soon.

'Sirius,' Harry said quietly, 'washroom?'

'Upstairs, first door on the right.'

Sirius was sitting in the armchair as Mr Weasley was trying to engage him in a conversation. They were all waiting for Remus and Tonks's parents, Andromeda and Teddy. Ron and Hermione watched him carefully as he crossed over to the stairs and quickly walked up.

Harry swiftly shut himself in, breathing heavily, as though all the oxygen was going to leave his body. He turned the tap on and splashed some cold water on his face. There were too many people here. Too many people. He took a seat on the toilet and took out a picture from his dress robes. It was taken the summer before their second year. Their arms were around each other's shoulders and Harry was making the bunny sign behind her head while she was messing up his hair in retaliation. He has other pictures of her, but this was their first.

When he finally left the washroom, he saw that the room opposite to him had a gold plaque that read: _Arabella_.

His throat had gone dry when he took a step inside the room. It looked exactly as it did in number twelve, Grimmauld Place. The walls were the same rich blue colour with the same bed and same brown covers. The posters of the Beatles, Frank Sinatra and a Triumph Bonneville T120 were in the exact same place while the mahogany chest drawer was in the same corner of the room. Shay was there as well, near the window, though he looked as though he lost his purpose.

But there were other things in the room as well that Harry didn't notice at first. There was a picture of Sirius and Kassandra on the side table. There was a baseball bat next to the chest drawer, as well as her Firebolt. On the wall that Harry was standing beside, there was a small dressing table that had pictures attached to the mirror. He looked at them closely and saw that there were some of him, Ron, Hermione, the other Weasleys, the Tonks, Sirius, Remus and Kassandra.

'Harry, it's time to –'

Hermione and Ron walked up the stairs to get him and saw him inside the room. From outside, they knew what it was, but didn't dare walk in. Hermione's eyes started to water and she quickly rushed downstairs while Ron waited for him, but his eyes were fixed on the washroom door.

The two of them walked downstairs quickly, out of the house and to the cemetery with everyone else.

Sirius was torturing himself by living here. There were too many ghosts. Arabella Torell, Kassandra Anastas, Arabella Black… He was putting himself in a very depressing environment. Harry understood that Sirius wanted to be closer to his family, but he doesn't know if he could do it himself.

Harry and Ron made their way over to where Arabella was going to be buried next to Kassandra. The empty casket was open in front of the big white tombstone.

_Arabella Kassandra Black_

_BORN February 25, 1980_

_DIED June 18, 1996_

_Older men declare war. But it is the youth that must fight and die _

Andromeda Tonks has made an effort to pointedly ignore him. She held on to her husband, Ted, with glossy eyes. Tonks was standing beside her, not looking any better than before. Remus was standing next to Sirius as they both stared at the headstone as though waiting for it to disappear. The Weasleys, Fleur, Moody, Hermione and Harry gather around, none of them wanting to be the first one to speak –

'She was an idiot,' said Moody in a gruff voice.

Hermione eyes grew wide while Ron looked as though he wanted to personally knock Moody to the ground and keep hitting him.

'Shut your mouth,' snapped Andromeda, hot tears burning her eyes, rounding off on him. 'Don't you dare talk about –'

'She couldn't handle Lestrange and you know it,' growled Moody and the two of them went toe to toe with their chest touching. 'Black was out of her league. She should have waited for anyone of us to handle that crazy witch. She should have let someone else have her.'

Andromeda let out a harsh laugh. 'You've known her for her whole life and you don't even _know_ her. She wanted Bellatrix. She's always wanted her. Arabella wants to be the one to kill Bellatrix. Did you really think she was just going to stand aside and let that opportunity slip from her fingers?'

'Yeah, and look where that's got her,' said Moody, indicating at the tombstone with his walking stick. 'Dead before seventeen, yeah, that's a good way to go.'

'Sometimes there isn't a way out,' Andromeda Tonks said through gritted teeth.

'Heard the one before,' said Moody, rolling both his magical and human eyes. 'Gonna have to try something else on me.'

'This is not the first time you've lost a soldier, Mad-Eye,' Tonks said quietly.

'SHE WAS NOT A SOLDIER!' yelled Mad-Eye and everyone jumped back in surprise. Fleur let out a little squeal before stumbling backwards. Bill caught her just before hitting the ground. 'Arabella was not a soldier. She's a kid… She's just a god damn kid…'

He broke off, turning away from everyone and looked down at the ground. Andromeda's face softened a fraction before she put her hand on his shoulders. He didn't shrug it off and they stood there together.

'I held her once,' said Moody, his voice unusually soft, 'when she was a baby. I never told her that. She reminded me so much of Isaak and Hekabe; I wanted to knock her in the head sometimes.'

There was a moment of silence as Andromeda's hand on Moody tightened and they both, for a small moment, understood each other.

'But you can't blame her for believing in something,' said Ted Tonks after a couple minutes. 'She believed she could do it, you know. She knew she could take on Bellatrix. She wanted to do it for –'

'She believed in laughing,' said Fred, interrupting Ted. 'She believed in happiness. She made inventions for fun. She loved to prank people. She almost out pranked us. She gave us her inventions. She believed in happiness.'

'She turned us into women,' said George. 'Frederica and Georgia Weasley.'

Fred, George, Ron, Ginny, and Bill laughed a little. Tonks had a small smile on her face.

'You're wrong,' said Hermione, closing her eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath. 'She believed in friendship. She believed in bravery. She was brave. _She was so brave_,' she said the last part in a whisper.

'She was stubborn,' said Ron with a lopsided grin. 'She was stubborn as hell and so thick-skinned that it was amazing. She almost cussed Snape during our first Potions class.'

'She called out Umbridge so many times,' said Hermione and the two of them shared a smile.

'And she punched Malfoy,' said George. 'Twice.'

Hermione, Ron, Fred, George and Ginny let out a shaky laugh.

'She was something else,' said Ginny with a sigh. 'That's for sure.'

Sirius was watching them all with a hungry expression. He was taking all of this in. He, the person who had the least amount of time with Arabella, was taking all this information in.

'She was a fighter,' said Ted with a small smile towards them. 'She might not have been a solider, but she sure as hell was a fighter.'

'She made that Bulgarian guy,' said Ginny, 'what was his name? Nate something –?'

'Nikola,' said Harry quietly.

'Yeah, him,' said Ginny. 'She punched him in the stomach and made him choke on soap. She doesn't make empty threats.'

'She tried to pick a fight with Crabbe and Goyle,' said Ron. 'And was usually strong for a girl that short.'

'Not that short,' said Ginny.

'She brought light in darkness,' said Tonks quietly. 'She believed in fairness and –'

'You're wrong,' said Remus, speaking for the first time. They all looked at him, a bit shocked. He looked as though he was struggling not to yell at all of them. His palms were on his eyes, as though hoping to squeeze them back into his head with his fingers gripping his hair. 'You're wrong. You're wrong. You're all just so wrong.'

They all looked at each other briefly, confused and taken back. Remus looked as though he was in physical pain. When his hands dropped from his face, his eyes were bloodshot red with his hair in disarray.

'Arabella Black is…' he began, trying to find the right words. 'She's the kind of girl that puts others before herself. Yeah, she might like to laugh here and there, and invent things along the way. She might be a fighter and stubborn and thick-skinned, but that's not –'

He closed his eyes for a moment and turned his head towards the left, as though there was a pain in his neck.

'She's… she's too hard on herself,' he continued on. 'And it's always for the things that are never in her control. She never forgave herself for what happened to Kas. She thought it was her fault. She thought that everything bad that happened in her life was her fault. There was so much hatred in her life that it was unbelievable that she was able to function at all. She believed in hatred, in anger, in revenge. She was either going to turn into Kassandra or Bellatrix, and I don't even know which is worse. Putting your life in deliberate danger or becoming a mad lunatic.'

'Don't you say that,' said Andromeda, scowling at him with tears streaming down her face. 'Don't you dare say that about her. She was never going to be like them at all –'

'Open your eyes, Andromeda,' said Remus harshly. 'Kassandra practically dug her own god damn grave.'

'Arabella would _never_ have turned into Bellatrix,' said Andromeda, almost shouting at Remus.

'Look at her family,' said Remus. 'A spy gave birth to her, her father went to Azkaban, her grandfather couldn't keep his mouth shut, her grandmother was full of secrets, her whole family is a bunch of Death Eaters, she was raised by a werewolf and has Mad-Eye for a friend. The only normal thing about her is the fact that she's dead!'

'Shut up!' snapped Sirius, rounding off on him. 'Shut your fat trap or I swear I'll…'

'You'll what?' said Remus, his voice rising. 'What are you going to do Sirius? You gonna hit me?'

'That's enough,' said Mr Weasley. He and Bill were trying to separate the two of them, but were pointedly ignored and shoved away.

'At least you had time with her,' Sirius growled. 'At least you got to know her. You were there for her when I wasn't and you're complaining about it. You have nothing to complain about. I would gladly give up whatever's left of my life for what you had.'

'You not being there for her is your own fault,' said Remus. 'You got yourself locked up by chasing after Peter. Don't complain to be about that. You did that to yourself. You messed things up for yourself.'

'I told you to shut your mouth,' Sirius said threateningly.

'You gonna hit me?' Remus said in a low voice and Harry was taken back. He peered closely at Remus and realized something.

Remus was deliberately looking for a fight. He wanted Sirius to desperately punch him in the face. He wanted Andromeda to slap him. He wanted someone to hurt him just so he can forget that, even for a fraction of a moment, Arabella was gone.

'Stop it!' said Mrs Weasley, clutching on to her handkerchief. She pushed Sirius and Remus away from each other as she herself shook with rage. 'A child is dead. Your child' – she looked at Sirius –'and your child' – she looked at Remus –'is dead, and you're both acting like blabbering buffoons. She would not want the two of you acting like such imbeciles.'

Sirius and Remus looked ashamed at themselves while looking down at the ground in embarrassment.

'Arabella is… gone,' said Mrs Weasley, struggling to say the last word as she twisted her handkerchief in her hands. 'She is gone and it doesn't matter what she believed in or who her family is or what she might have turned out to be. At the end of it all, she was a good person. She was good,' she said in a hushed voice, as though her throat was tightening up.

Mr Weasley put his arm around her shoulders while Mrs Weasley quietly sobbed on his chest.

'She wasn't just that,' said Harry quietly. 'She's a good person, there's no denying that, but it's that fact that she is who she is that's amazing, you know what I mean?'

None of them seemed to. They all looked confused.

'She's had a horrible life,' he continued on, 'but she turned out good in the end, didn't she? She was resilient. She had a huge chip on her shoulder, but look at how she turned out. She could have turned into another Death Eater easily. She could have turned into Bellatrix. But she didn't. She was kind, compassionate, loyal, brave, independent, kind, honest – I could go on for days, really. She stood up to those who deserved it and defended those who needed it. Arabella had all the opportunity in the world to turn into someone like Bellatrix, but she didn't and that's who she really is. She turned out to be so good despite everything that's happened.'

Harry shuffled his feet where he stood. His eyes were burning as he looked at the ground, feeling his throat cave in.

'She is the best of us – she is the best of _me_ – and I'm never going to forget that,' he added after a moment.

There was a moment of silence.

'Well said, Harry,' said Fred as he and George nodded.

There was a small moment of silence as everyone let his words sink in. Sirius and Remus were both watching him with expressionless faces before nodding.

'Should we – should we say goodbye then?' Andromeda asked, looking at all of them. She took the silence as a yes.

One by one, they all stepped forward and placed something in the coffin that either reminded them of Arabella or something that they wanted her to have when she went to the… other side.

Hermione was the first one to step forward. She placed a small stack of pictures and letters inside the coffin before turning to the tombstone. She placed a hand softly upon it before saying, 'You were right. There are things more important than rules – loyalty, bravery, friendship. You'll always be my girl.'

She turned away as her voice became slightly higher with a fresh new set of tears appearing on her face. Ron gently squeezed her shoulders before placing his old wizard chest set in.

'You never could beat me, you know,' he said with a small, sad smile. 'You're a great wizard and I love you like a sister.'

Ginny had placed Arabella's Dumbledore's Army coin and a picture of everyone that joined.

'I was talking to some of the member before the end of the year,' she said quietly, 'they said that your story gave them a reason to fight. They joined because of you. You inspired them to fight.'

Mr and Mrs Weasley brought a box of sweets and a knitted red sweater with a golden lion on it.

'Sleep well, dear,' said Mrs Weasley thickly, 'and take care of yourself.'

Fred and George brought a box of inventions that were already in their store.

'We have a couple in your name,' said Fred. 'The skin colour changing one and the bomb.'

'Still never figured out the gender change though,' said George. 'Think you can swoop down and tell us?'

When nothing happened, Fred said, in a small voice, 'Don't go.'

Bill and Fleur gave her a bottle of sand from the beach and flowers from France.

'You saved my sister, Gabrielle,' said Fleur, smiling at the tombstone. 'Thank you.'

Moody placed his Auror badge inside the coffin.

'You would have beaten them all,' he said in a low voice. 'You would have outshined them all. Kas, Isaak, whoever. You would have been the best of the whole lot.'

Andromeda and Ted gave her a box full of pictures and knickknacks.

'Please,' pleaded Andromeda, her face shiny with tears. 'Please don't go. I love you so much, please –'

Her voice began to crack considerably and she held onto Ted, wailing with pain.

Tonks had placed three of her stuffed animals in there, the dog, the wolf and the stag.

'We had so much fun, didn't we?' she said softly. 'I'm gonna hold on to that. All those sleepovers, the activities, trying to play baseball, and the incident with the horse. I'm going to hold on to those and whenever I'm feeling sad, I'll think of you and all those times we had together.'

Remus had placed a very thick photo album, a leather jacket and an oversized cardigan. The album had all the pictures of her from the time she was born up until her death.

'My life was pretty sad and pathetic before you came along,' he said tenderly. 'I didn't really have much going for me and then you sort of came along and everything was alright because I knew at the end of the day, you were there and that… that seemed to brighten things up a little.' Remus took a deep breath. 'Please… don't be dead. I never asked you to do anything for me, but please – please don't be dead…'

Sirius placed a wooden chest box, a miniature model of a motorcycle and a wrapped up blanket. The two of them were supposed to go riding on his bike the moment Sirius was declared a free man.

'I've done some things in my life that I'm not so happy about,' he said, placing his hand on the tombstone. 'My mother made me feel like crap and my father was no better. I always had James and Lily and Remus and Kas and Arry, but you were the first thing I knew I did right. When I first held you, I couldn't believe you were my kid. You were this whole other thing in my life I really knew I did right by. I love you, I hope you know that. Say hi to your mom for me.'

Harry took out the picture from his robes and placed it inside slowly. He then placed his hand on the tombstones and whispered quietly so that none of the others heard him.

'I'm not saying goodbye because this is not the end. This is thank you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for all the joy and happiness you brought into my life. For all the memories because I'm never going to forget you. I'm never going to forget how amazing you are, how brilliant you are. I'm never going to forget how you look, your eyes, your smile, the way you move, the way you talk, the way you just know things, I'm never going to forget how brave you are or how tough you are. I'm never going to forget how stubborn you are or how you just seem to radiate. There's a war coming, and I'm going to fight for you.' He then straightened his spine, licking his lips and tasting the saltiness of his tears as his throat seemed to cave in once again. 'I'll see you later, Arabella.'

Once the coffin is lowered into the ground and the dirt is covering it, they all start to leave slowly. Andromeda and Ted Tonks leave with Andromeda sobbing uncontrollably on Ted's shoulders. Fred and George leave as well, using the joke shop as an excuse, but they all knew it was closed for the day. Bill and Fleur left, following Fred and George.

Just as he was about to Apparate back to the Burrow with Moody, he takes one last look back and sees that Sirius and Remus are still standing in front of her tombstone, talking quietly to each other.

Looking up at the sky, Harry realized something. There hasn't been a proper sunny day since Arabella died. She was the sun, and she has truly set.

* * *

'I supposed you like the way Phlegm says 'Arry, do you?' asked Ginny, scowling.

'No,' said Harry, wishing he hadn't spoken, 'I was just saying, Phlegm – I mean, Fleur –'

'I'd much rather have Tonks in the family,' said Ginny. 'At least she's a laugh.'

'She hasn't been much of a laugh lately,' said Ron. 'Every time I've seen her she's looked much more like Moaning Myrtle.'

'That's not fair,' snapped Hermione. 'She still hasn't gotten over what happened… you know… I mean, she was her cousin!'

Harry's heart sank. They had arrived at Arabella. He picked up a fork and began shoveling scrambled eggs into his mouth, hoping to deflect any invitation to join in this part of the conversation. The funeral was still fresh and raw to him.

'She thinks it was her fault she died,' Hermione said much more quietly.

'How does she work that one out?' asked Harry, in spite of himself.

'Well, she was fighting Bellatrix Lestrange, wasn't she? I think she feels that if only she had finished her off, Bellatrix couldn't have killed Arabella.'

'That's stupid,' said Ron, crossing his arms.

'It's survivor's guilt,' said Hermione. 'I know Remus and Sirius have tried to talk her around, but they're all really down. All three of them. Tonks is actually having trouble with her Metamorphosing.'

'With her –?'

'She can't change her appearance like she used to,' explained Hermione. 'I think her powers a must have been affected by shock, or something.'

'I didn't know that could happen,' said Harry.

'Nor did I,' said Hermione, 'but I suppose if you're really depressed…'

* * *

'What are you doing here?' Andromeda asked with the deepest abhorrence she could muster. She was clutching some fresh flowers from her own garden and was about to lay it on Arabella's grave when she saw Narcissa Malfoy.

'I came to pay my respects,' she said. 'We are family, after all.'

'You're not her family,' spat Andromeda. 'Now leave.'

Narcissa narrowed her eyes at the person she once considered her sister for a moment before smiling coldly.

'Make me,' she said in a tone of mock challenge.

Andromeda took a step closer to Narcissa until their toes were practically touching and Andromeda could feel Narcissa's breath on her.

'If you come here again,' Andromeda said slowly, 'I guarantee that it will be the last thing you will ever do.'

'Really?' said Narcissa, her smile growing. 'What are you going to do, sweet sister? Send dear Sirius on me, or that mongrel Lupin? Better yet, send that husband of yours, you know how much I like to laugh.'

'Do not think, _sweet sister_,' Andromeda said mockingly, 'that just because your Dark Lord is back that you are safe. He and your Death Eater friends won't always be there to protect you. Your son is going to turn out just like his father, a pathetic little wimp of a boy with no backbone.'

'Don't you dare talk –' Narcissa flared up.

'I'll talk about him anyway that I want,' said Andromeda, straightening her spine and looking down at her sister. 'From what I've heard, he's an unpleasant little turd and given who he was raised by, I'm not surprised.'

Narcissa made a move for her wand, but Andromeda already took hers out.

'Walk away, Narcissa,' she said in a low voice. 'Walk away unless you want to spend the rest of your life in a double cell with Lucius.'

Narcissa's scowl turned into a smirk within seconds.

'You know,' she said in a glorious voice, 'if would have just let me have her all those years ago, the girl would be alive and safe.'

She turned on her heels and walked out of the cemetery while Andromeda shook with rage at her wake.

* * *

Harry snatched up a pile of filthy Quidditch robes and left the room. Arabella would have believed him. She would have believed that Malfoy was a Death Eater.

* * *

The dungeon was already full of vapors and odd smells. Harry sniffed interestedly as they passed large, bubbling cauldrons. The four Slytherins took a table together, as did the three Ravenclaws with Ernie sharing with them. Harry, Ron and Hermione chose the table closest to a gold-cauldron that was emitting one of the most seductive scents Harry had ever inhaled. Somehow it reminded him simultaneously of treacle tart, the woody smell of a broomstick, hot chocolate and peaches.

He found that he was breathing very slowly and deeply and that the potion's fumes seemed to be filling him like a drink.

Slughorn stood up at the front, beaming around at them before his eyes fell upon the empty seat next to Hermione.

'Such a shame,' he muttered.

* * *

Harry knocked on the door.

'Come in,' said Dumbledore's voice.

'Good evening, sir,' said Harry, walking into the headmaster's office. '

'Ah, good evening, Harry. Sit down,' said Dumbledore, smiling as he put aside a compass. 'I hope you've had an enjoyable first week back at school?'

'Yes, thanks, sir,' said Harry.

'You must have been busy, a detention under your belt already!'

'Er,' began Harry awkwardly, but Dumbledore did not look too stern.

'I have arranged with Professor Snape that you will do your detention next Saturday instead.'

'Right,' said Harry as Dumbledore glanced briefly at the compass he put aside again.

It was a golden-brown compass that was around the size of Harry's palm. It was ancient looking with a chain attached to it.

'Is everything alright Professor?'

There was a short pause, then Dumbledore said, 'Have you ever heard of a man called Acamas Angelopoulos, Harry?'

'No.'

'Acamas was said to be a brilliant wizard. He used to create various instruments, such as the lunascope. He went to his very school and excelled in his classes. But, somewhere along the way, he went mad. His wife and child had both died during childbirth and he was never the same after that. This compass was his last invention.' He placed the instrument in front of them now. 'There were only four that were ever made. Two of them were destroyed and one disappeared along with Acamas. This is the last one left. My friend, Nicholas Flamel, gave this to me shortly before passing away.'

Harry didn't see why the compass was so significant or why Dumbledore was dwelling over it.

'This compass, unlike most, does not point north,' Dumbledore continued on. 'It points to the owner's deepest desire. It was Acamas's finest invention to date.'

Dumbledore picked the compass up slowly and unlocked it. The inside lid was a map of world in light colours. The needle on top was a long black one that spun around momentarily.

'There's a note inside the compass that I added a while ago,' said Dumbledore. 'I was going to give it to Arabella eventually.'

Harry's throat went dry. 'Why?'

Dumbledore sighed deeply. 'I supposed it doesn't matter anymore. I should not disturb the dead with meaningless notes.'

He put the compass aside and Harry knew that there was nothing meaningless about it.

* * *

Sirius, though having the option to do so, doesn't go back to the Auror Department. He works closely with Dumbledore and Mad-Eye Moody, doing what, Harry does not know. He has an idea that it has something to do with Arabella.

Remus looks slightly better than the last time Harry saw him, though there was a permanent look of sadness on his face and everyone can sense it.

* * *

'You see!' said a strained voice. Tonks was glaring at Remus. 'She still wants to marry him, even though he's been bitten! She doesn't care!'

'It's different,' said Remus, barely moving his lips and looking suddenly tense. 'Bill will not be a full werewolf. The cases are completely –'

'But I don't care either, I don't care!' said Tonks, seizing the front of Remus's robes and shaking them. 'I've told you a million times…'

And the meaning of Tonk's Patronus and her mouse-coloured hair, and the reason she had come running to find Dumbledore when she had heard a rumor someone had been attacked by Greyback, all suddenly became clear to Harry.

'And I've told _you_ a million time,' said Remus, refusing to meet her eyes, staring at the floor, 'that I am too old for you, too poor… too dangerous…'

'I've said all along you're taking a ridiculous line on this, Remus,' said Mrs Weasley over Fleur's shoulder as she patted her on the back.

'I am not being ridiculous,' said Remus.

'Yes, you are,' chimed Sirius.

'No, I'm not,' said Remus steadily. 'Tonks deserves somebody young and whole.'

'But she wants you,' said Mrs Weasley, with a small smile. 'And after all, Remus, young and whole men do not necessarily remain so.'

He gestured sadly at his son.

'This is… not the moment to discuss it,' said Remus, avoiding everybody's eyes as he looked around distractedly. 'Dumbledore is dead…'

'I think,' said Harry, before anybody else could speak, 'that Arabella would have wanted you to be happy in the end and to not deny yourself your own happiness. And Dumbledore would rest happier knowing that there was still some love in the world.'

Remus looked startled but Sirius smiled at him sadly as the hospital doors opened once again.

* * *

_I shouldn't have loved him. _

_I shouldn't have left him. _

_'I'm so sorry,' Arabella whispered as she watched Harry standing by himself in the garden of the Burrow. _

* * *

_Arabella raged and trashed whatever she could get a hold off when Remus asked to join the others on the mission. She wanted to come down there personally and strangle him. But when she saw Sirius use a Stinging Curse on him, she felt slightly better. _

_She spent her time doing nothing except watch other Harry, Ron and Hermione, maybe the others on occasion as well. She cries when Ron leaves and cheers when they are reunited once again. _

_But Arabella truly feels the worst when she sees what Bellatrix has done to Hermione. If she was there, that would never have happened. Arabella would never have let that psychotic witch touch her sister. Never. _

* * *

'Boy or girl?' Remus asked.

'Girl,' said Nymph, smiling as they lay in bed during the sleepy hours of the morning. 'Definitely a girl. I can sense it.'

'Can you now?' asked Remus, still a little tired.

'Couple more days 'till we find out,' said Nymph. 'I was thinking… we should make Sirius the godfather, right? Him and Harry, they can both be the godfather.'

'I believe it's not conventional to have two of them.'

'Since when have we been a conventional family?'

* * *

_They are all there for the birth of the new Lupin baby. James and Lily, Isaak and Hekabe, Dumbledore, Moody, Arabella Torell, Kassandra, Ted and Arabella. They watch on happily as Andromeda helps deliver the baby, proclaiming it to be a healthy and loud baby boy. _

_They all cheer at the news and cry as they name him Teddy Remus Lupin, no one more so than Ted himself._

* * *

The Snitch. His nerveless fingers fumbled for a moment with the pouch at his neck and he pulled it out.

_I open at the close. _

Breathing fast and hard, he stared down at it. Now that he wanted time to move as slowly as possible, it seemed to have sped up, and understanding was coming so fast it seemed to have bypassed thought. This was the close. This was the moment.

He pressed the golden metal to his lips and whispered, 'I am about to die.'

The metal shell broke open. He lowered his shaking hand, raised Draco's wand beneath the Cloak, and murmured, 'Lumos.'

The black stone with its jagged crack running down the center sat in the two halves of the Snitch. The Resurrection Stone had cracked down the vertical line representing the Elder Wand. The triangle and circle representing the Cloak and the Stone were still discernible.

And again Harry understood without having to think. It did not matter about bringing them back, for he was about to join them. He was not really fetching them: They were fetching him.

He closed his eyes and turned the stone over in his hand three times.

He knew it happened, because he heard slight movements around him that suggested frail bodies shifting their footing on the earthy, twig-strewn ground that marked the outer edge of the forest. He opened his eyes and looked around.

They were neither ghost nor truly flesh, he could see that. They resembled most closely the Riddle that had escaped from the diary so long ago, and he had been memory nearly solid. Less substantial than living bodies, but much more than ghosts, they moved toward him, and on each face, there was the same loving smile.

James was exactly the same height as Harry. He was wearing the clothes in which he had died and his hair was untidy and ruffled, and his glasses were a little lopsided, like Mr Weasley's.

Remus was younger, and much less shabby, and his hair was thicker and darker. He looked happy to be back in this familiar place, scene of so many adolescent wanderings.

Lily smiled widely at him. She pushed her long hair back and she drew closer to him, and her green eyes, so like his, searched his face hungrily, as though she would never be able to look at him enough.

'You've been so brave.'

He could not speak. He eyes focused on Arabella as she smiled at him. It looked as though time did not pass between the two of them. He thought that he would like to stand and look at her forever, and that would be enough. He would be fine if he could do that. His hand reached out to touch her cheek and for a moment, he thought that it would be possible.

His hand went through her and they both could sense each other's pain.

'You are nearly there,' said James. 'Very close. We are… so proud of you.'

'Does it hurt?'

The childish question had fallen from Harry's lips before he could stop it. His eyes search Arabella's. He has missed her grey eyes.

'Dying?' said Arabella. 'Not really. It's peaceful. It's quick and easy.'

'And he will want it to be quick. He wants it over,' said Remus.

'I didn't want you to die,' Harry sad. These words came without his volition. 'Any of you. I'm sorry –'

He addressed Remus.

' –right after you'd had your son… Remus, I'm sorry –'

'I am sorry too,' said Remus. 'Sorry I will never know him… but he will know why I died and I hope he will understand. I was trying to make a world in which he could live a happier life.'

A chilly breeze that seemed to emanate from the heart of the forest lifted the hair at Harry's brow. He knew that they would not tell him to go, that it would have to be his decision.

'You'll stay with me?'

'Until the very end,' said James.

'They won't be able to see you?' asked Harry.

'We are part of you,' said Lily. 'Invisible to anyone else.'

Harry looked at Arabella.

'Stay close to me,' he said quietly to her.

'I always am,' she said.

And he set off. The Dementor's chill did not overcome him. He passed through it with his companions, and they acted like Patronuses to him, and together they marched through the old trees that grew closely together, their branches tangled, their roots gnarled and twisted underfoot. Harry clutched the Cloak tightly around him in the darkness, traveling deeper and deeper into the forest, with no idea where exactly Voldemort was, but sure that he would find him. Beside him, making scarcely a sound, walked James, Remus, Lily and Arabella, and their presence was his courage, and the reason he was able to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

* * *

'Harry Potter,' Voldemort said very softly. 'The Boy Who Lived.'

None of the Death Eaters moved. They were waiting: Everything was waiting. Hagrid was struggling, and Bellatrix was panting, and Harry thought inexplicably of Arabella, and her smile, and the feel of her lips on his –

Voldemort had raised his wand. His head was still tilted to one side, like a curious child, wondering what would happen if he proceeded. Harry looked back into the red eyes, and wanted it to happen now, quickly, while he could still stand, before he lost control, before he betrayed fear –

He saw the mouth move and a flash of green light, and everything was gone

* * *

Harry saw Yaxley slammed to the floor by George and Lee, saw Ron and Neville bring down a screaming Dolohov, saw Walden Macnair thrown across the room by Hagrid, hit the stone wall opposite and slide unconscious to the ground. He saw Aberforth Dumbledore Stunning Rookwood, Arthur and Percy flooring Thicknesse, and Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy running through the crowd, not even attempting to fight, screaming for their son.

'NOT MY DAUGHTER, YOU BASTARD!'

Mrs Weasley nearly knocked him over, throwing off her cloak as she ran, freeing her arms. She stood in front of Fenrir Greyback as he bared his teeth at her, happy for a new challenge. Ginny had been fending Greyback from a scared looking second year. He almost got the better of her as Mrs Weasley came running.

'What will happen to your children when I've killed you?' Greyback snarled. 'It's a shame that I never fully got to your son. Billy, was it?'

'You – will – never – touch – our – children – again!' screamed Mrs Weasley.

Greyback laughed and ran at Mrs Weasley, his teeth shining.

Molly's curse soared and hit Greyback in the middle of his chest.

Greyback froze for a moment, staring incredulously at Molly before toppling over –

Voldemort was dueling McGonagall, Slughorn, and Kingsley at once, and there was cold hatred in his face as they wove and ducked around him, unable to finish him –

Bellatrix was fighting too, fifty somewhat yards away from Voldemort, she dueled two at once: Hermione and Luna, both battling their hardest, but Bellatrix was at a different level compared to them –

'OUT OF MY WAY!' bellowed Sirius to the two girls.

Bellatrix spun on the spot, roaring with laughter at the sight of her cousin coming to challenge her.

With a swipe of his wand, Sirius began to duel with Bellatrix. Harry watched with terror and delight as Sirius Black's wand slashed and twirled, and Bellatrix Lestrange's smile faltered and became a snarl. Jets of light flew from both wands; the floor around the wizards' feet became hot and cracked. Both Blacks were fighting to kill.

'NO!' Sirius yelled as a few students ran forward, trying to come to his aid. 'Don't! SHE'S MINE!'

Hundreds of people now lined the walls, watching the two fights, Voldemort and this three opponents, Bellatrix and Sirius, and Harry stood, invisible, torn between both, wanting to attack and yet to protect, unable to be sure that he would not hit the innocent.

'Do you miss her, cousin?' taunted Bellatrix, as mad as her master, capering as Sirius's curses danced around her. 'Tell me, how did it feel when you watched helplessly as I finally ended her? Do you miss little _Arabella_?'

Bellatrix laughed, the same exhilarated laugh Arabella had given as she toppled backward through the veil, and suddenly Harry knew what was going to happen before it did.

Sirius's curse soared beneath Bellatrix's outstretched arm and hit her squarely in the chest, directly over her heart.

Bellatrix's gloating smile froze, her eyes seemed to bulge. For the tiniest space of time she knew what had happened, and then she collapsed, and the watching crowd roared, and Voldemort screamed.

* * *

The war was over.

In the years that will come, people won't talk about the lives that were lost. They won't talk about the orphaned children or the sacrifices that were made on May 2, 1998. Nobody will tell you about the amount of people that were buried or how so many of them lost count.

They will only tell you one thing: _we won._

* * *

Sirius had joined the Auror Department after the war getting his old job back thanks to Kingsley. Harry, Ron and Neville joined him as well, rounding up the escaped Death Eaters. Sirius was second in command, working alongside Robert Trenholm, Head Auror, intently. They became fast friends as Trenholm understood Sirius's need to put away all remaining Death Eaters.

Andromeda had packed up all her things and moved in with Sirius at Godric's Hollow. They raised Teddy together, bringing him up to be a fine, young lad, though rather mischievous a time. _He's living up to his father's legacy_ Sirius said often at times, grinning down at blue-haired Teddy.

Sirius's happy to have a second chance. Andromeda is happy to have family.

* * *

Harry was standing next to Ron as he recited his vows to Hermione, both of them beaming at each other. He's happy for his two best friends, he truly is, but he can't help but feel a little resentful as everyone claps and cheers at the newlyweds. George and Angelina are set to have their wedding in a couple months with Neville and Ginny following them closely.

As he watches Ron and Hermione dance for the first time as husband and wife, he completely understands why he's resentful.

He's lonely.

Maybe it's time to finally take up Ginny's offer and let her set him up with someone.

* * *

Malinda Arling is nice and pretty, but she can't really look at Harry and keeps stuttering around him. Gwen Grout was still getting over her ex-boyfriend while Sophie Conte just figured out she liked girls.

Ginny really was horrible at this.

* * *

'Are you sure?' asked Harry once again, making Hermione groan with irritation while Ron rolled his eyes yet again. 'Are you positively, absolutely sure?'

'Yes,' they both said at the same time.

'Honestly, mate,' said Ron, rubbing the bridge of his nose, 'nobody better for the job.'

Harry looked down at the baby in his arms. Charlotte was sleeping quietly, making a clawing motion with her little hands, disregarding the rest of the world. He shifted his arms slightly, emitting a small little noise from Charlotte, though she fell back to peace immediately.

'Yeah, alright,' Harry, beaming up at him.

Harry was determined to be a great godfather to Charlotte, just as he was with Teddy, just as Sirius was with him, and just as Remus Lupin had been with Arabella Black.

* * *

Harry finally, _finally_ got out of the meeting with Robert Trenholm with Sirius, Ron, Neville and some of the representatives from the upper level. They were pretentious pricks and Harry couldn't wait to get away from them. Ron practically ran out of the room, eager to get home to Hermione and their newborn girl while Neville had to go and get some flowers for a heavily pregnant and a very angry Ginny.

He was about to turn a corner, heading towards the elevators, when he bumped into someone, sending papers flying everywhere.

A young woman, about Harry's age looked a bit shocked, but that slowly turned into anger as she looked at Harry. She put her hands on her hips and her nose seemed to flare up at his presence. She had shoulder-length light brown hair that could easily be mistaken for blonde that was pulled back into a messy ponytail and dark brown eyes that glared at Harry.

'Look at what you've done,' she said harshly and Harry frowned. 'Look at the mess you've made.'

'My mess?' said Harry, insulted. 'I didn't do this. You should really look at where you're going.'

The angry woman made an insulted noise. 'Typical. The Chosen One can't even admit his own faults.'

'I would admit it _if_ it was my fault,' snapped Harry. 'But it's not.'

He took out his wand and the woman's eyes widened, thinking he was going to hex her. With a flick of his wand, the papers rushed into her startled arms and Harry walked away, trying her best to forget that unpleasant woman.

* * *

Sirius made a name from himself after the war as a quite ruthless when it came to gathering up the last of the Death Eaters. Harry, Ron and Neville were good, but neither of them had the same conviction or desire as Sirius. He was, as the Daily Prophet named him so many times, a Phenom.

So when they found out years later that there were three escaped Death Eaters roaming around Iceland, he was beyond furious.

Everything seemed to come into full circle. The Aurors finding out that there were free Death Eaters reminded Harry too much of what happened to Kassandra Anastas and Arabella. He had a feeling something like that was going to happen again as he, Ron and Neville stood on the other side of the interrogation room mirror.

And he was right.

They took their eyes off the Death Eaters for a minute and they escaped.

* * *

Everything was in a blur for the next twenty four hours.

Aurors running around frantically. Neville going off to send a message to Ginny and Hermione. Ron tracking down Senior Advisors from the Department of Magical Transportation. Sirius barking out orders.

And Harry receiving a message from Hermione saying that Andromeda and Teddy were at St. Mungo's.

* * *

Sirius raged on as the Healers patched up Andromeda. Teddy was fine. He was hiding in the bathroom with the doors locked. They didn't even think to go and look for him at all.

Harry stayed outside with Teddy, who understood a little of what was going on. He understood that his grandmother was hurt, nothing more, and that she was going to get better soon.

There wasn't much damage done to Andromeda Tonks. She was tough and they got to the house just in time before they tortured her. The Healers said they were going to keep her overnight for observation, but she seemed fine and kept insisting to everyone she was.

Teddy snuggled up in his arms, sighing happily before looking up at him with big hazel eyes.

Harry smiled down at him before kissing his forehead. He was personally going to make sure that those low lives, scum of the earth Death Eaters were never going to see the light of day ever again.

* * *

Azkaban is dark and cold. There was no need for any Dementors with an atmosphere like this. It was constantly raining and constantly gloomy. Harry could feel the sadness and the dread as he stepped foot on the estate. He pitied Sirius for spending all those years here, though not so much for the person he was going to see.

He made his way over to cell 54B, ignoring the noises of laughter, cries of anguish and pleas of mercy.

The Death Eater, the ringleader of the group, turns to him with a satisfied smirk on his face.

'Why'd you do it?' asked Harry, his voice strong and loud.

The Death Eater continued to smirk at him. 'Because _you_ didn't have anybody, so we went for the next best thing.'

* * *

Harry was happy that there was no one significant in his life. There was no wife or girlfriend to come home to or a child that looked like him running around. There was no one criminals can hurt to get to him. That was fine.

* * *

(He was alone)

* * *

'There you are,' said Ginny happily, sitting down on the table next to Harry. 'I have some exciting news.'

Harry raised an eyebrow. He set down his glass of butterbeer while Ginny continued to bounce in excitement in front of him.

They were at the Burrow for Sunday lunch. The children were all playing outside, each of them running around and screaming.

It's been about a year or so since the incident. Neville left the Auror Department, opting to study under Professor Sprout to become the next Herbology Professor at Hogwarts. Security measures increased everywhere and becoming an Auror was now a very demanding job. It was only now that people started to feel a little more safer.

'Did Frank catch the tooth fairy yet?' Harry asked lightly.

'No,' said Ginny, her shoulders slumping. 'We can't even give him the bloody Galleon because he stays up at night with a net to catch the tooth fairy!'

'You should give him a Sleeping Potion,' said Harry.

Ginny's eyes widened for a moment and she looked livid. 'I am not going to drug up my son, Harry!'

'Okay, okay,' said Harry, raising his had in surrender. 'Just a thought. Anyways, what's the exciting news?'

Ginny's face turned back to excitement once more. 'I've set up another date for you.'

'Ha!' said Harry, laughing.

'What is that supposed to mean?'

'It means you are horrible at setting me up for dates.'

Ginny looked insulted. 'Am not!'

There was a small pause in which Harry just scrutinized Ginny, who conceded in the end.

'Okay, fine, Malinda wasn't the best and I honestly thought Gwen was over Owen –'

'She was going out with a guy named _Owen_?' asked Harry.

'Yeah, I know,' said Ginny, grimacing. 'And I really didn't know about Sophie, but I did set her up with Kim and they seem very happy now. Come on, Harry, one last time and I'll stop. I promise.'

Harry sighed, knowing he was going to regret this later. 'Fine, what's her name?'

'No need to sound so miserable,' said Ginny. 'Her name is Julia Toews.'

* * *

'I don't know, Hermione,' said Harry, shaking his head. 'I don't know about this date.'

Ron rolled his eyes while Charlotte slept soundless in his arms. Hermione was rocking Alex back and forth, finally getting the young lad to calm down.

'You never know,' said Hermione, shrugging. 'You might like it.'

There was a small pause in which Alex yawned, emitting a loving smile from Hermione. She kissed his head before turning back to Harry.

'She would want you to go on that date, Harry. She would want you to be happy.

* * *

Harry has no idea why he's so nervous. If history can tell him something is this: Ginny Weasley is horrible at setting up Harry. It's not like she's horrible at setting up people in general. She got the captain of the Holyhead Harpies married to the captain of Puddlemere United.

Harry was the problem. At least to Ginny he was.

He was supposed to meet this Julia Toews at the Leaky Cauldron for a drink. He was thinking about how this date was going to end. All the unpleasant thoughts were going through his mind when a woman popping up and took a seat across from him.

'You!' said Harry, shocked.

The unpleasant woman all those years ago that he bumped into was sitting across from his, smirking. Her hair was lighter than before and longer, pulled back into a braid that reached way past her shoulders.

'Me,' said the woman simply. 'Julia Toews, nice to meet you.'

'Ginny sent me up with you,' said Harry. 'Why?'

'Well, she was going to get some lunch with Hermione Granger and met me on the way,' said Julia Toews, shrugging. 'We got to talking and she told me about this amazing guy that would have been perfect for me. I'm a little surprised it's you, but it's fine.'

'Look, no offense or anything, but I'm not really looking for any sort of relationship or anything like that –'

'Good, I'm not either,' said Julia, taking off her coat. 'Relationships bore me after a while and I don't plan on having one anytime soon.'

'Then why are you here?'

Julia shrugged again. 'I was bored.'

Harry waited for her to continued and kept looking at her expectantly. 'That's it? You were bored? That's all you have to say?'

'I was bored at home,' said Julia, taking a sip of his drink. 'I had a long day at work and need to do something… _fun_. So what do you say, Mr Potter? Are you up for something fun?'

Harry was confused. Too confused for his own liking.

'I don't – what's going on?' he said finally, he looked around the pub for some sort of explanation, wondering if someone was going to pop up and explain everything to him in detail. Nobody did.

Julia Toews sighed and leaned back against her chair. 'Look, Harry – can I call you Harry? Doesn't matter, I'm going to do it anyway – I'm not going to lie to you. I'm up for a position in Milan in their Department of Magical Law Enforcement. I don't know when they're going to decided who the position is going to go to – it's between me and Legrand and he annoys me. I want that position more than anything in the world. It means more to me than my own life – okay maybe not my own life,' she added hastily at Harry's look of skepticism, 'but it means a lot to me.'

'So what are you asking me?'

'I just need to have some fun every once in a while with someone. No strings attached.'

It took Harry a moment for all her words to sink in, and when it did, he nodded, bringing a smile to Julia Toews.

'No strings attached though,' said Harry.

'No strings attached,' said Julia, agreeing to her.

At least for one of them it was true.

* * *

Harry tried to find fault in Julia Toews wherever he can, trying to tell himself that she was horrible and self-centred. That she was going to leave him one day.

But she's not horrible or self-centered. She was funny, slightly hyper at times, loves to bake cakes, and a bit messy. She's ambitious and smart and charming. Most of them time all she talks about is the job in Milan.

And as Harry stood at the frame of the kitchen door months later, watching her mix yet another chocolate cake in his shirt that was too long for her, he knew that the 'No strings attached' policy was a little at void for him.

* * *

Julia looks like the sun with her hair that shined in a bright day. But she was a star, burning bright and soaring too close to the sun. She'll get herself burned before she gets what she wants.

When Harry visits Sirius, bringing a new toy for Teddy, he sees the picture of Arabella on the bookcase shelf, along with many other photos of her.

_She _was the sun.

And the way he looked at her was the same way with Ron and Hermione, with Ginny and Neville, with Bill and Fleur, and with Mr and Mrs Weasley.

* * *

(It wasn't until months later when he realized what he was feeling wasn't love or affection. It was the fact that he wasn't alone for a while. He hated using Julia like that. He hated himself for that)

* * *

Julia Toews should not be jealous of a dead girl.

Dead girl gone before her time. Dead girl whose bones are not even buried. She should not be jealous of a girl that means nothing to her.

But in the middle of the night, she sits on the bed, watching Harry quietly mumble her name under his breath. _'Arabella.' _Julia can't help but hate the dead girl.

* * *

There was a party at Ron and Hermione's house for Charlotte's fourth birthday, ad Harry was bringing Julia, who was very reluctant. He never took her out anywhere and she never took him out anywhere. They both liked it this way. But today was a little different.

'What happened to 'no strings attached'?' she hissed just as they reached the door.

'It's a birthday party,' said Harry, knocking on the door. 'It'll be fine. I promise you, no strings attached.'

The door opened to a beaming Sirius, though his face slightly fell at the sight of Julia.

'Sirius, this is Julia Toews, my friend,' said Harry as the two of them shook hands. 'Julia, this is my godfather, Sirius Black.'

'It's nice to meet you, Mr Black,' said Julia kindly.

'You, too,' said Sirius before clapping his hands together. 'Well, the kids are in the back and the food should be ready in a bit. Why don't you go to the back, Harry? The kids are waiting for you.'

Walking to the backyard, he nearly got toppled over as three kids rushed towards him.

'Uncle Harry, Uncle Harry!' said Charlotte, jumping up and down. 'Tell Teddy to stop bugging me!'

'Why are you bugging Charlotte, Teddy?' asked Harry with a smile.

'She won't let me have a turn on the broomstick,' said Teddy, pouting.

'It's mine!' said Charlotte resiliently.

'Auntie Hermione said I could have a turn!'

The two of them continued to argue and bicker while Frank looked over at Julia, who looked nervous at the sight of the three kids.

'Who are you?' he asked bluntly and loudly.

Teddy and Charlotte stopped arguing momentarily and looked over at Julia as well, gazing up at her with reservation.

'Guys, this is Julia,' said Harry, squeezing her hand for a moment. 'Julia, this is Teddy, Charlotte – the birthday girl – and Frank.

'Nice to meet you all,' said Julia with uncertainty.

The three of them continued to stare at her, making Julia more uncomfortable. Charlotte and Frank looked at each other for a moment before turning and walking away. Teddy, sensing that their presence was gone, walked away as well.

'I – I don't get it,' said Julia. 'Did I do something wrong?'

'No, no,' said Harry reassuringly. 'It's just that you're someone new, that's all.'

Well, apparently it wasn't just the kids that didn't like her. Ron and Hermione weren't very keen to having her around (especially for their daughter's birthday), Neville belatedly didn't like her (and whispered it very loudly to an agreeing Fleur), Sirius tried to be nice, Andromeda ignored her, Victorie followed Charlotte and Teddy's lead, and everybody else pretended to be nice to her.

'I don't get it,' said Harry holding Alex, after Julia went back to her flat, claiming she was tired. 'What's going on?'

Ginny gave him a small look of pity. 'You don't know do you?'

'Know what?'

'You work in the Auror Department, how do you not know?'

'_Know what_?'

'She got offered the position in Milan and she apparently took it.'

'She did?' said Harry. 'Who told you?'

'Hermione,' said Ginny, continuing to look at him in pity. 'I'm sorry, Harry. I know you like her and all –'

'No, no, I'm fine,' said Harry, shaking his head.

He supposed he should be mad at Julia for not telling him, but he's honestly feeling nothing at the moment. He thought that he might have at least _liked_ her. Harry thought he did months ago.

Maybe it was a lie he let himself believe that he was in love again.

* * *

'So, when were you going to tell me?' asked Harry the next day, popping into her flat during breakfast. 'That you took the job in Milan.'

'Oh,' said Julia, putting her fork down. 'Today actually.'

Harry took a seat on the small dining table across from her. 'When are you leaving?'

There was an awkward pause in the room. Julia licked her lips, tears coming to her eyes. 'I didn't take the job, Harry.'

_That's surprising _thought Harry. Her favourite topic of conversation these past couple months have been about that dream job of hers.

'I don't get it. Why didn't you take it?'

'Oh, Harry. I can't travel anymore and they gave the job to Legrand – _bloody_ Legrand.'

'Why can't you travel anymore?'

Julia took a deep breath. 'Harry, I'm pregnant. '

* * *

_March 25, 2005_

* * *

Harry paced back and forth in the waiting room, feeling a sense of dread as Ron soothed a tired Rose while Hermione was reading Matilda to Charlotte, making sure that Charlotte knew nothing of what was really happening or why her godfather was panicking. Alex was watching Harry from where he was sitting with big brown eyes.

'Sit down, mate,' said Ron, worried enough without Harry pacing the room. 'It's going to be a while before someone comes out.'

Harry took a seat next to Ron, but his legs kept bouncing. Hermione gave him a look of pity before turning back to the book. Alex got up from his seat and started to climb on Harry's legs.

'Why didn't she want you in there with her, anyway?' asked Ron, trying to burp Rose.

'No idea,' said Harry shortly, his legs kept bouncing, emitting a giggle from Alex.

Lie. It was a complete lie. Nobody but Harry knew why. He didn't tell Ron, Hermione, Sirius or anyone the truth. It would be better this way.

'Two months is way too early right?' asked Harry.

'I don't know, mate,' said Ron honestly. 'The Healers said they would both be alright, right?'

'Yeah,' said Harry, continuing to bouncing his leg up and down in anxiety. Alex had taken a seat next to Ron, staring at little Rose.

'Do you know if it's a boy or girl?' Ron asked after a while.

'Nope.'

'Do you know anything?'

'Nothing.'

Ron sighed. 'Way to be prepared, mate. What have you been doing these last couple months?'

_Trying to talk Julia out of taking the Paris job_ Harry thought to himself. _Stop her from leaving me and the baby. Losing a battle against her. Getting ready to raise the baby by myself. Though not actually ready at all. _

'Nothing,' said Harry shortly. 'I'll be back. Sirius should be here soon.'

He quickly walked to the washroom, pacing in there as well, and thinking back to the day when things changed yet again for him.

* * *

_'So you're leaving?' asked Harry, not finding this surprising at all._

_For the past couple of months he watch Julia mop and groan around his flat, complaining every day as her belly got bigger. She wasn't complaining about the fact that she was pregnant, but the fact that she wasn't in Milan, that she wasn't doing what she wanted. It drove Harry up the wall, but it was Sirius and Hermione that, in a lack of better words, told him to suck it up._

_'Yes,' said Julia, brightening up for the first time in the months. 'It's in Paris and it's not as great as the one in Milan, but I will be able to handle cases by myself and in a couple years, hopefully, I'll be head of the department over there. Isn't that exciting?'_

_'So you took it,' stated Harry. _

_'Yes, I start in April,' said Julia, nodding. _

_'Wow,' said Harry, rubbing his eyes. 'What about the baby?'_

_Julia's face fell. 'Harry, you and I both know I was never meant to be a mother.'_

_'Look, I understand this is important for you,' said Harry. 'I'm not going to hold that against you. I'm actually a bit happy for you. _A bit_. But haven't you grown a little attracted to the baby?'_

_Julia looked down at the belly. _

_'I don't know, Harry. There are some days when I think I am, but I don't think the kid deserves me. You weren't there growing up with me. You don't understand what happened to me as a kid. My family is a bunch of fucked up people that never should have reproduced. This kid deserves to have someone else as its mother.'_

_'So then what do I tell the kid when it grows up and wants to know where you are?'_

_Julia hesitated. 'Tell the kid what you want to, Harry. Tell him or her they deserved someone better than me.'_

* * *

Harry stopped pacing at the loud banging noise at the door.

'I know you're in there, Harry,' said Neville loudly. 'Hurry up, or I'll name the kid myself. I did a pretty job with naming Alice, don't you think?'

'Name the kid after your mother and Mrs Weasley is not _that_ original,' said Harry bitterly as he opened the door and walked back to the waiting room.

Everyone was there. Sirius, Andromeda, Mr and Mrs Weasley, Bill and Fleur, George and Angelina, Teddy, Victorie, Dominique, Fred, Frank and newborn Alice. This did not ease Harry's worries.

'Is everything alright?' asked Sirius, standing up immediately. 'Did they say anything?'

'Nothing so far,' said Harry. 'The Healers said that everything was going to be fine, but… two months early is bad, isn't it?'

The look on Sirius's face did not ease his worries; neither did the ones on the Weasleys.

'Well… it's not good,' said Sirius.

'Oh, god,' said Harry, feeling sick as he took a seat.

No one them knew what to do at this point. They looked at each other, feeling remorse while wondering how it all went wrong.

'Well, have you thought of any names, dear?' asked Mrs Weasley, trying to stir the conversation in another direction.

'No,' said Harry, shaking his head. He looked as though he was about to spill the contents of his stomach in front of them.

Just then, to all their reliefs, a Healer walked to the waiting room, looking tired and exhausted.

'Mr Potter?'

'Yes, that's me,' said Harry, his body shooting up from where he was sitting. 'What happened? Is everything okay? Is the kid alright? Is there something wrong with the baby? Something bad happened, didn't it? Oh, god, I knew it…'

'No, no, nothing bag happened,' said the Healer, reassuring him. 'Your wife is –'

'She's not my wife,' said Harry. He didn't know why he needed to say that when there was something else more important going on. 'Sorry, go on.'

'Your… girlfriend,' she said uncertainly and when Harry said nothing, she continued on, 'is fine. The baby is early, and her organs have not completely developed so we're going to keep her here for a while in the incubator, monitor her, feed her the proper nutrition to build the immune and digestive systems. She's a bit small right now, but we're hoping that in about two weeks, she should be fine to take home.'

'So there's no lung or heart problem or anything like that?'

'She is in an incubator for now, like I said, she's a bit small and she's two months premature. We're going to monitor her for any changes in breathing or heart rate for a while. Her organs are not fully developed properly, but we're going to make sure she's alright, Mr Potter. We are going to give her the proper fluid and make sure everything's alright before you take her home.'

'But –'

'The baby will be fine, Mr Potter,' said the Healer definitely. 'Everything will be fine. I was there when she came out. She is going to be fine.'

'All right, then,' said Harry, nodding as the Healer walked off. 'Wait, wait, it's a girl?'

'Yes, Mr Potter,' said the Healer, continuing to walk away, not turning back to look at him.

Harry stared as the Healer walked away, watching her while everyone else smiled and looked happy at the new addition.

'Congrats, mate,' said Neville, clapping his shoulder. 'It's a girl!'

Harry quickly walked to the nearest garbage bin, doubled over and threw up the contents of his stomach. All the children shrieked while Bill and George laughed.

* * *

He thought that at least Julia would stay for a while to make sure the baby was alright. Mothers should do that, right? They should make sure their baby was safe and well.

But when he entered her room in St. Mungo's, bringing flowers along, she was running around the room frantically, packing things into a bag and zipping it up. She was leaving.

'I'm sorry,' she sobbed, tears streaming down her face. 'I'm so sorry. I knew this would happen. I knew it! I can't be a mother. I can't be responsible for another person's life. I'm so sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry.'

She kept throwing items into the bag and then she started to punch it out of frustration and anger.

'Okay, okay, what's wrong?' asked Harry, taking the bag away and holding her shoulders as she sat on the hospital bed.

'I – I can't do this,' said Julia, shaking considerably. 'I can't be a mother. I don't know how to be one. First five minutes into the job and I already fucked things up for her. There was something wrong with the placenta and she's in a box because of me, and – and – '

She took a deep breath, bringing her fingers to her mouth.

'You'll be a great dad, Harry,' she said quietly. 'Better than mine at least. Knowing where I came from and who brought me up, the kid deserves someone better than me.'

There was an uncomfortable silence in the room. Harry didn't want to fight her anymore. He was too tired and felt too old to do so. If this is what she wanted, then it's fine by him.

'So this is goodbye then?' asked Harry.

'Yeah, I guess it is,' said Julia. She then got up and hugged him lightly. They stood there for a while before Julia whispered, 'Did you ever love me, Harry?'

It didn't take Harry a long time to figure it out. 'No.'

Julia nodded into his shoulder. 'Yeah, I figured as much. You could never really get her off your mind, could you? I was a distraction for you, just like how you were a distraction for me.'

Harry kissed her temple, and curled her hair behind her ear. 'I still like you, though.'

Julia smiled at him gratefully. 'I like birds, Harry, but it's not the same. Everything you do, you do it for her. Making a name for yourself in the Auror Department was for her. Making sure the guilt got locked up and the innocent were set free was for her. Taking care of Sirius, Teddy, Hermione, Ron and the others, that's all for her. You might like me, but she's your inspiration, and you'd do anything for her. Take care, Harry'

She kissed his cheek before picking up her bag and walking out the door.

* * *

There's a special place in St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries for premature or ill babies. As Hermione would like to say, it's the wizarding version of a NICU. She didn't bother to explain what each letter meant to Ron or anybody else, but they understood what she meant when they all entered that room at one time or another.

She was so tiny. It was incredible how small she was, sleeping on her stomach with the tiniest of black hair on top of her head.

Harry was by himself. He knew and everybody else knew he needed to do this alone. He sniffed a little as he gently touched the glass, watching his daughter breath slowly.

'She's doing really well, Mr Potter,' said a Healer kindly. 'She's responding well to the fluids and her organs seem to be developing quite well. You should be able to take her back home soon.'

'Thank you,' said Harry, rubbing his already red eyes, though he was smiling.

The Healer returned the smile. 'Have you thought of any names for her? Us Healers cannot keep calling her 'Baby Girl Potter' all the time.'

Harry nodded. 'Yeah, I've got a name. Arabella Lily Potter.'

* * *

He didn't name her after someone he loved. He named her after someone who died too young. Someone who deserved to live a long life. Someone who was brave, kind, loyal, stubborn, and, above all, a good person.

People who have the name 'Arabella' didn't seem to live a long life. Arabella Torell, Arabella Black…

Things were going to be different for Arabella Potter. He was going to make sure of it. Her family – Sirius, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, Mr and Mrs Weasley, everyone – was going to make sure of it.

* * *

Everything he does, he does it for _her_. The new sun in his life.

* * *

_5 years later_

* * *

Professor McGonagall invited them all out for the final Quidditch match of the year and for the feast where she was going to announce the new Herbology Professor: Neville!

Ginny couldn't have been more happy and was having a tough time keeping the secret as she seemed to wanted to burst out with the news.

Ginny, Hermione, Ron, Sirius, Teddy, Charlotte, Alex, Rose, Hugo, Frank, Alice, Cora, Arabella and Harry were going early for the Quidditch while Mr and Mrs Weasley were heading over for the feast.

Harry sat on the picnic blanket, watching Sirius and Ron try to referee the pretend Quidditch match with the kids. It was a disaster as the kids kept driving Sirius and Ron crazy.

Hermione and Ginny opted to stay in the shade with Hugo and Cora, while still watching the others. He could hear the two of them laugh in amusement when Rose and Arabella started to hit Ron with their broomsticks. Sirius broke it up.

He looked at his daughter, giggling in Sirius's arms. She was something else, that's for sure. His own daughter – he can never get tired of saying that. The little hellfire, living up to her last name and already creating chaos at the age of five. Harry honestly felt sorry for Professor McGonagall when Arabella turns eleven and heads off to Hogwarts.

He took his eyes off her momentarily as somebody collides with him. He looked at toothless little Alice smiling at him before standing up, already knowing what his goddaughter wants from him. He slowly picks her up and hangs her upside down, making her laugh and shriek with glee.

'Harry, put her down!' called Ginny from where she was sitting.

'Fine, fine,' said Harry as Alice frowned when her feet touched the floor. He turned and gave a smile to Ginny and Hermione, the former glaring at him, and then turned to the kids again. They were playing tag, chasing each other and running away from Frank, who was it. He smiled over the manes of red, brown, blond, blue and knew someone was missing.

'Where's Arabella?'

* * *

The forest was an interesting place to little Arabella Potter. It was big and Teddy kept whispering stories of the animals that lived there. She wanted to see a unicorn, wanting to see if they were real or not. She and Rose kept having arguments about that.

Arabella Potter watched her feet, trying not to trip over the rocks and roots so that she wouldn't ruin the sweater Grandma Weasley made for her. She was a long way from where the others were, but she had to find out!

Then, a little farther from her, she saw something shining on the ground. Her eyes widened and all thoughts of unicorns left her mind. She quickly ran over to it and saw that it was a small red stone. Almost like a jewel.

Arabella Potter picked it up slowly and delicately as she could with her five year old hands. She stared at it in wonderment with her eyes widened.

'It's pretty, isn't it?' said a soft voice.

Arabella Potter screamed and jumped back, frightened. She quickly ran behind a tree, clutching the stone to her chest.

'It's okay,' said the same voice. 'I'm not going to hurt you, dear. I just want to see you.'

'Daddy told me not to talk to stranger!' Arabella Potter cried out.

'Well, I'm not exactly a stranger,' said the voice. 'I know who you are and I know who your Daddy is. Please come out and see me.'

Arabella Potter slowly peered over the tree, eying the stranger before realizing something was wrong with the stranger.

'Who are you?' she said bluntly.

'I'm Arabella,' said the stranger.

'No, you're not.'

'Yes, I am.'

'No, I'm Arabella.'

'And I'm Arabella Black,' said the woman, her hand reaching out for her. 'I'm an old friend of your dad. Come here, let me see you.'

Arabella Potter walked towards the lady carefully, moving as slowly as she could so that she could inspect this Arabella Black. She was a pretty lady, smiling down at her kindly with warm eyes that reminded her of Grandpa Sirius.

'You look exactly like your father,' said Arabella Black, crouching down at Arabella Potter's eye level. 'From the hair to the eyes to the suspicious look on your face. You're his carbon copy.'

Arabella Potter smiled at her. She liked it whenever people said that about her.

'Thank you!' said Arabella Potter, about to give Arabella Black a hug, but she just went through her. 'Why can't I hug you?'

Arabella Black sighed. 'I'm not alive, dear.'

'Oh,' said Arabella Potter. 'Like Teddy's parents?' she whispered, her eyes widening.

'Yes, like Teddy's parents,' said Arabella Black nodding, looking sad now. She then looked down at the stone in Arabella Potter's hands. 'You see that stone you're holding? That stone brings back someone from the other side. Someone you've never met.'

Arabella Potter nodded. 'Why are you here?' she whispered.

'Because you wanted to see me,' said Arabella Black softly. Her fingers were close to the child's face, but she knew she would never be able to touch her. 'Because you wanted to see whether or not guardian angels exist. I'm very flattered, by the way.'

Arabella Black smiled at the child before drawing her hand away and sitting down properly on the ground of the Forbidden Forest.

'So, tell me, who's your best friend?' Arabella Black asked. 'As the guardian angel of Arabella Potter and a messenger, I believe I should know.'

'Rosie!' shouted Arabella Potter gleefully. 'And Alice and Teddy and Frank and Charlotte and Alex and –'

'Okay, okay I get it,' laughed Arabella Black. 'You have a lot of friends, don't you?'

'Oh, yes,' said Arabella Potter, nodding. 'Daddy says they're our family, just like Grandpa Sirius and Grandma Weasley and Grandpa Weasley. Grandma Weasley made me this sweater,' she pulled at her red and gold sweater proudly, displaying it for the kind lady.

Arabella Black smiled at the child, but it dropped when she heard some shouting.

'Arabella! Arabella! ARABELLA!'

'It seems as though someone's looking for you,' commented Arabella Black.

Just as those words slipped from her lips, Harry and Sirius came running to their direction, Ron and Hermione just a few short steps away.

'Arabella, you must not come into the forest,' said Harry, slightly angry. 'We were all worried about you. Come on, let's go back to the castle and we'll talk about this later.'

'No, but Daddy, look at what I found,' said Arabella Potter, holding the stone up in her clenched fists. 'And then she came to me,' she added pointing at where the other Arabella was sitting. 'I really think she's my angel, Daddy.'

Harry and Sirius looked at each other.

'Sweetheart,' said Sirius gently, 'there's nobody there.'

'Yes, there is,' said Arabella fiercely. 'She said her name's Arabella, like me, and that I look like Daddy.' Shen then turned to Arabella Black. 'Can't they see you?'

'No,' she said. 'Only you can see me.'

'Oh,' said Arabella Potter. After a minute or two, she said, 'I'm not going to see you again.'

'No, you're not,' said Arabella Black, shaking her head. 'But I'm always going to be watching over you, making sure you're safe and happy. Me, Grandma Lily and Grandpa James will be watching over you. Okay?'

'Okay,' said Arabella Potter, smiling sadly at her.

'Good. Can you do me a favour? Can you tell Grandpa Sirius how much I love and miss him? Can you do that for me?'

'Don't you want to see him?' asked Arabella Potter. 'Do you want to see her?' she asked Sirius.

Sirius crouched down to her level while Harry was talking to Ron and Hermione, explaining to them about this.

'Sweetheart, I am too old to worry about ghosts. My time will soon come. I know I will see her one day, and not a day sooner or a day later.'

Arabella nodded. 'She said she loves you this many,' she stretched her hands as far apart as she could, 'and misses you that many,' she tried to stretch even more.

Sirius laughed. 'And I love and miss her even more than that.'

'You're not leaving me are you?' Arabella whispered.

'No, not yet. Come on,' he said, opening his arms. 'Let's go back.'

Sirius picked her up as the stone fell from her hands and landed soundlessly on the ground. He walked past where the others were and out of the forest with Arabella in his arms. Ron and Hermione looked troubled before following them out as well, leaving Harry alone in the forest.

He was back in the forest just like before. Alone, knowing what he had to do.

Picking up the stone and turning it three times in his hands, she appeared in front of him, looking the same as ever.

'You look good, Harry,' Arabella said, nodding. Her eyes were watery and raw sounding. She was beautiful, with the same smile and same grey eyes. 'You did a good job with your kid. She's really great.'

'Thanks,' said Harry, smiling at her.

'But the name, Harry,' said Arabella, sounding tired. 'Why'd you name her that? The name's a curse.'

Harry let out a small chortle. 'The name's not a curse. It's a nice name. I like it.'

'Hermione and Ron had two chances to name one of their kids after me and they blew it,' muttered Arabella. 'All I get is a lousy middle name from them.'

'It's not that bad.'

'Sure, to you, maybe,' said Arabella, huffing.

The two of them stood there in silence for a moment, gazing and smiling at each other.

'You know this can never happen again,' whispered Arabella. 'We can't see each other again like this.'

'I know,' Harry said in a low voice.

She took a step closer and gently tried to touch Harry's cheek. For a moment, for the briefest of minutes, he felt something.

'I'm always with you,' she said, placing her hand just above his heart. 'Goodbye, Harry.'

Looking at her, relishing the beauty of her presence, Harry let the stone fall in between his fingers. Within a second, she was gone and he was alone in the forest yet again.

Tears came to his eyes before he could stop them. Whoever said 'time heals all wounds' was a liar and didn't understand anything. Harry quickly wiped them off, not wanting to break down in front of his daughter, not wanting to explain to her just how much Arabella Black meant to him.

Still wiping the tears, Harry quickly left the forest and the stone. Arabella clung to his legs immediately.

'I'm sorry, Daddy!' she shouted from the top of her lung. 'I'll never go into the forest again – _dumb_ forest! I didn't mean to, I promise! Rosie made me do it!'

'Did not!' shouted Rose, her face turning as red as her hair.

'Did too!'

'Not!'

'Too!'

They got into some sort of childish fight in while they began to hit each other with feeble arm, though not causing any damage whatsoever.

Harry and Ron broke it up, carrying their respective daughters in their arms while everyone laughed at the display. Arabella and Rose continued to look angry at each other, but Harry knew they could never stay mad at each other for too long. Within five minutes they would be back to laughing with each other, saying, 'What fight?'

'I know you didn't mean too,' said Harry quietly to Arabella. 'Everything's fine, right?'

'Right!' exclaimed Arabella, sticking her tongue out at Rose, who returned the gesture.

Harry laughed once more. They were going to be just fine.

* * *

_With shortness of breath, I'll explain the infinite_

_How rare and beautiful it truly is that we exist_

**Thank you for reading! **

**Before DH came out all those years ago, I always thought R/Hr would have four kids, two of each. Also, when I write the ****epilogue of the story with Arabella, I'm not completely going by the original one. There will be changes made by me. **


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